1000....really?

Holy Mother of all that is pure and true! I now have 1000 tagged photos of me on Facebook. I say "tagged" cause some are just so fug that I untagged them but...but.....How the hell did this happened? 1000? Duuuudeee.......

I'm a mega camwhore. Super duper one. When I die they probably gonna write this on my tombstone:

The Constantly Dramatic One

Sept 21st 198* -

Daughter. Sister. Friend. Drama Queen. Sexay Penguin.

Purdy Sunflower. Mega Camwhore.

You know they totally would....

My list of possible lesbian lovers....

otherwise could be titled: If-ever-there-comes-a-time-when-I-am-no-longer-lusting-for-Clive Owen-and-have-no-desire-to-become-his-kept-woman-or-to-sire-his-illegitimate-children...I-would-totally-become-a-lesbian-and-do-these-chicks.

Also for all those of you who got a stick stuck up your asses, no I'm not a lesbian. Even if I am it's none of your problem and I'm speaking specifically to those individuals of excessive homophobia and overzealous religious beliefs. But as it is, this whole list is a joke. If you can't take a joke than I suggest you take that stick stuck up your asses and your dignified selves elsewhere. No one making you stay and read my blog at gun point now, are they?





So now I present to you the top ten women that the Constantly Dramatic One would totally go lesbo with. Durn durn duuuuuurrrrnnnn!



Number 10: Mariah Carey

I know a lot of you guys are going...."Dude, Mariah Carey? WTF?".

I know....I know. She is skanky and trashy. But you know, I think she's a hot kinda skanky and trashy. I put her down on my list of "Lesbian One Night Stand" cause no way in hell I wanna get into a domestic partnership with this woman. Bitch is crazy.




Number 9: Lucy Lui







Lucy has this really quiet kinda sexiness. She would not jump off the page as someone who is really sexy or in fact beautiful. But when she speaks and move, you just cannot take her eyes of her. It's the quiet confidence thing. I always think that out of the 3 Charlie's Angels- Cameron Diaz is the cute one, Drew Barrymore is the charming one and Lucy Liu is the slinky, uber sexy one.


Also if you have ever seen "Payback", you know that that part with Lucy in the dominatrix getup is pretty much hard to forget.

Number 8: Marlene Dietrich

Ahhhh Marlene, I know she's dead but her sensuality lives on for centuries to come. She exudes an aura of insatiable mystery every time she's on the screen. Maybe its the German accent, maybe its those famous legs of hers, or how the smoke from her cigarette always framed her face, or maybe because she was always so beautifully lighted in every movie she have ever been in therefore presented at her best like a fine work of art.....*le sigh*

Number 7: Amanda Bynes

Okay Amanda isn't exactly your typical babe. But she is funny ,talented and pretty. She seems to be working hard and keeping her personal life out of the spotlight....unlike some people *cough* Lindsay Lohan *cough*.




If I really am a lesbian, I'll ask her to marry me (same sex marriage is a go in California people) and then together we'll go to the sperm bank to get artificially inseminated and rear a beautiful family together. The kids can call her Mom and me Mama so that they won't be confused with having two mothers and all.






Number 6: Gabrielle Union


Have you watched "Bad Boys 2"? What about "Bring It On"? If you haven't than I suggest you do cause when you do, you'll know why she's on the list.





Number 5: Tina Fey


Intelligence is sexy and Tina Fey has loads of that.

Talented, funny, smart, pretty - Ms.Fey is the whole package. She seems like the type that would like to debate you on everything. Politics, philosophy, what's for dinner tonight- everything.


Which is good cause the relationship is always intellectually stimulated but then I guess most of the time I would need to tell her to shut the hell up and put on the strap-on.


Ahem.


Also those glasses are hot.


Number 4: Marilyn Monroe





Seriously. You guys have got to see this coming.





Number 3: Gong Li

This woman have just recently entered my list. I think she looked gorgeous in "Memoirs of a Geisha", if not a little bit of a psychopath. But still gorgeous. I really don't get why Zhang Ziyi was cast as the most beautiful geisha when it's clear that Gong Li look so much better than her.


Either way, Gong Li goes on my "Lesbian One Night Stand" list. She's hot but I bet she's scary as hell.






Number 2: Barbara Mori





Anyone familiar with those trashy Mexican telenovelas would know who Barbara Mori is. "Rubi" anyone? I think she is the most beautiful woman on Planet Earth. Screw Miss Universe, Barbara Mori is the real deal. I know that dress she's wearing is fug but it's one of the few pictures that she's actually covered up. This woman cannot keep her clothes on.



I loved her in "Rubi". She was just simply magnificent playing the title character. Such a manipulative, crazy, greedy, deceitful, evil bitch. So delicious in her evil doings. Also one of the highlights of the show is when she screams "Pokeno mi amore?!! Pokeno?!!!" And I'll be at home going "Si bastardo!! Pokeno?!!! Pokeno?!!"

Number 1: Cate Blanchett



I know........unexpected.


But Cate has a certain ethereal beauty to her. She wasn't cast as Galadriel for nothing. She's a chameleon, always delivering her best in her movie roles and managed to look stunning on the red carpet. She's intelligent, she's mysterious, she's pure class. And that's why she's my number one pick of lesbian lover.


One day...I might just abandon Clive for her....
Might: Key operative word there.


I am tagging Natalija with this. I know she'll love it.

Come here, pussy cat

You know what, Katy Perry's song 'I Kissed a Girl' is releasing the gay in me. We're talking full fledge gay here. Screw this bisexual thing I got goin on. I wanna be gayer than George Michael during a pride parade.

Now I just need to find me a gay girl to go gay with...

Any takers?



Update August 5th 2008


Seeing that there is a deafening, uncomfortable silence from the girls (via the comment box)....I think I'll make a list of possible lesbian lovers for me in my next post. Just to push it even more and make everyone squirm. Mwahahahahhaah!!

I'm such an evil bitch.

Changes

I changed the layout. Yet again. Been having troubles with the other layout. My posting seems to have gone missing and the pictures looked washed out. I cannot take it anymore. It has been pissing me off like crazy.

It was puuurdy I give you that, but stupid as hell....Much like dating a bimbo.

It's all about randomness...

Sorry I had not been updating regularly. I want to say that I have been busy working hard for world peace and volunteering at the local orphanage but truth is....I have been hanging out with friends a lot. The only thing I have been doing is updating Valar Morghulis with cool pictures and quotes. You know...to keep up the charade of being a pseudo-intellectual artsy fartsy snob. When I'm really not. Just pretentious as fuck.


But then I saw this tag from Tine's blog and I am totally stealing it. Cause well, what good is a blog if you don't talk about yourself? And perhaps with this post, I would provide Princess Asshat from the previous post, who left that thinly veiled love message for me more ammunition to leave more of her aggressive love messages. In doing so, creating drama and giving the Constantly Dramatic One exactly what I want: drama.


C'mon Princess Asshat, make your idol happy. You know the sole purpose of your very existence is to please me. Be true to yourself. You know you want too....



So 6 random facts about moi: Part the 2nd. (For Part the 1st, go here)



1)I went through some rough emo period in highschool in which I was convinced no one loves me, everybody hates me. The pinnacle of the was this one time, in my ultimate emo moment, I threw.....something (can't remember what now) and that something shattered a mirror in my room. Still in my ultimate emo moment, took a shard of the said broken mirror and cut myself with it. I cut myself in my inner thigh so that nobody could see it. It hurts like a bitch. But at that moment....my ultimate emo moment mind you....it all seemed epic and made sense.


What kind of sense?


Fuck if I know dude. Now that I look back on it, that shit was all kinds of stupid. So listen kids, if you ever find yourself all emo and wanting to cut yourself "to feel alive", for the love of God, cut yourself somewhere else other than the inner thighs. Cause you know, it just doesn't hurt during the cutting. It also hurts when you're sitting down and your thighs go up to each other. I walked bowlegged for like a week after I cut myself.

Stupid ridiculous shit.


2) Once I got lost in Shah Alam for 3 hours. I ran out of fuel and I had no money nor any idea where the nearest petrol station is. So I called my sister, gave her directions as best I could than sat by the roadside crying my eyes out. This happened about a week after I get my P license so I was about....17, I think.


Really stupid shit.


3) You know when you read books, some of the character seems so attractive that you either want to be them, or are so familiar that you are convince that some part of you is them?....Get what I'm sayin?

I'm always convinced that I am Ron Weasley from the Harry Potter series. No, seriously. If I am not flesh and blood but just a character that live in the pages of novels, I'll be Ron. Completely. Or Carmen Lowell from the Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants. As for a character that I want to be? It'll be Arya Stark from the Song of Ice and Fire series. Bitch kicks major ass!


4) When I was a kid, my brother told me that toyols live in the toilet stool. And that these little bastards would bite my ass when I'm doing my business. I was so scared that I didn't do number 2 for like a week until I get sick. Until now, I always make sure that there are no toyols living in any of the toilet that I'm going to use.


5) I was a bulimic when I was 15. For a whole year. Three of my friends and I made a pact that we would always throw up after eating. My modus operandi was basically binge, drink a whole lot of water than stick a 2B pencil down my throat. 2B pencils have greater reach than my fingers because it goes all the way to the back of your throat.

I gave it up cause, well it hurts poking pencil down your throat all the time. Plus my mouth was starting to smell. Out of the 4 of us, only one of us continued until today. She's skinny now, but she's also constantly in and out of the hospital for dehydration and whatnot.


6) I am convince that one day, I would get Clive Owen in the sack. People call this "delusional". I call it "Long Term Goal".


So Princess Asshat, I know you're reading this. Feel free to leave more of your agressive love messages for me. Let the Constantly Dramatic One help you out with it. Why don't you go "Hah! Puke all the time won't get you thin you fat whore!" since you like that so much or maybe "Why don't you just cut yourself till you die?" or I dunno something more creative. I know your stubby little fingers and your vagina full of twigs is just itching for it.


Go for it Princess Asshat. Show me the love. Give me the drama I crave. And don't forget to use spell checker like you did last time....cause I know you did.