Humble and modest, that is me

I have been double tag by both Faye and Pourpres to do this tag. 15 random facts about the Constantly Dramatic One. I mean, who would want to know random things about me? I mean......I think this whole practice of telling people all facts all about me is just shallow and narcissistic. The Constantly Dramatic One is of course not shallow or narcissistic. I am humble. And modest. And the ultimate paragon of all that is pure and true in this world.




What's that?...........What are these mistruths you speak of? When have I ever claimed to be..."ossum". I have made no such claim. Modest and humble and pure and true persons such as I am will never make such claim. I do not need to claim to be ossum, tis an undisputed fact.


*buff nails*

Even though I am humble and modest and do not like talking about myself....at all..............I will do this tag. I will write 15 random facts about myself. Because in the blogsphere, we honour the age old tradition of blog tagging. Yes, that's the only reason. In no way will I enjoy writing all this about myself. In no way do I enjoy talking about myself. In no way am I narcisstic. At all. None.





Seriously.




1. I kiss and hug my parents every night before going to sleep. Also every time before I leave the house. This does not include the times we have arguments cause during those times there will be no hugging and kissing. Only shouting and slamming doors. And more shouting........... And slamming doors.



2. I have 6 people whom I met through the blogsphere on my Facebook: Prince, Quin, Peter, Faye, Melissa and Tine. People whom I have never met in real life but have grown to adore.





3. Red lipstick is most of the time, my everyday look. I rock red lipsticks better than anyone I know. Yes, better than anyone else I know. This is yet another demonstration of how humble and modest the Constantly Dramatic One is.



4. I do not go out to celebrate the coming of New Year or Merdeka (Independence Day), I just couldn't be bothered. I'm not bothered to go out clubbing or to watch the fireworks or whatever. The traffic is hideous, everything's overcharged, parking is a bitch and the crowd..... Oh God, the crowd. The

rempits, the posers, the horny illegal immigrants, the snooty "cool kids"- I cannot take it. Piss me off.



So what if I'm lame cause I chose to stay in on these nights, I don't care. I'm not the dumbass who's gonna be stuck in traffic for 5 hours, getting stressed out searching for parking or getting my ass grabbed by some Bangladeshi construction worker in the crowd...all for the sake of watching some fireworks blow up.


5. In an ideal world this is how my beauty regime would go:

The first week of the month: I shall go for a full body massage. The nekkid type. Ideally, the messues would be male, muscular, sexy, has a tight ass and resembles Clive Owen. Would be even better if the messues is Clive Owen. But alas, this is not an ideal world. Clive is an actor, not a messues.


The second week of the month: I shall go for a diamond peel facial. Where they massage your face with diamonds to encourage blood flow and all that jazz. None of those run of the mill facials for moi, only diamond facials are good enough. But alas, this is not an ideal world. Half the damn time I cannot even afford a McDonald's Happy Meal, much less something related to diamonds.


The third week of the month: I shall go for a fish therapy

I will sit there for half and hour and let them fished nimble away the dead cells on my feet and hence beautify them. All this goes on while Clive gives me a back rub. But alas, this is not an ideal world. Clive does not give me back rubs. Bastard.

The fourth week of the month: I shall go for mani and pedi. At this upscale nail boutique in which they would pamper me, beautify my nails and make me feel all special and purdy. But alas, this is not an ideal world. I do my own mani and pedi and most of the time my nails ended up lopsided. And all retarded looking. Also they're kinda transparent due to lack of some vitamin or other.



6. Samuel L.Jackson is my ultimate idol in badass-dery. Everytime I watched any of his movies, I have an insane need to go around calling everyone "motherfucker". Whenever I feel like someone is bullying me or pushing me to a corner, I think to myself "What would Samuel L.Jackson do?............He would whoop this motherfucker bitch azz up! That's what he'll do." I of course would not whoop anyone's bitch ass up..........cause I'm a pussy.



7. I am only interested in men who are 7 to 9 years older than me. Little boys around my age do not interest me.




8. I have not watched MTV for about 4 years now. I didn't even check out that channel when I'm channel surfing. I just grown to old to give a damn about awards, or the newest video clips or who's hot right, or who's dating who. That's just so highschool. And it's been ages since I left highschool I am after all twenty.............19 years old. Yes 19, just 2 years since I left highschool. Not that long ago when I think about.



Moving on.



9. I did not find out about sex until I was 14. True story, I am not making this shit up. I honestly do not know that people have sex to have babies. I thought people have sex for fun and babies just appear out of nowhere. No really, I am that fucking stooooopid. I remember the day I found out about sex. It was in Islamic Studies class and the teacher was talking about the sins of premarital sex and what happens if you get a baby from that.......and then it dawned on me that people have sex, babies come from sex, my parents have 3 kids...........................................................that was a very disturbing revelation. I can assure you that.




I can also assure you that my knowledge of sex have greatly improve since then. Ahem.



10. I cannot pronounce the word "beach". I can't. Don't try and teach me cause I just can't. It just comes out as "bitch". So I always say "seaside" instead. Conversations going round this word usually go like this:


CD: Yay!! We're here. Let's hit the seaside.
Random friend: You mean the beach?
CD: Yeah, the seaside.
Random friend:.................................Beach right?
CD: Yes, that's what I said. Seaside.


And round and round it goes.

11. One of the best things in life is when I read something, a book or an article, is when a line would jump out to me. Like when you read something and you stopped over a sentence, reflect and go "Damn, that is a good line. I wish I could write that." That is like one of my favourite things, finding those lines. And because I like them so much, I collect them. I write them out in my notebook so that I could look them over again and again. I appreciate the beauty of words. Words can be magical if you can weave them well.

And one of those people that can definitely weave words is Faye. I cannot tell you how many times that I stopped and go "Damn that was a good line, this woman can really write" while reading her blog. Then in a total act of word nerdy-ness, I'll write out the line or the phrase so that I can look it over in other time. I'm nerdy like that.

12. You know how men are fond of saying that women dress up nicely for them? I say bullshit. I never dress up for men. When I do dress up to go out, I always have women in mind. What men think is a non-issue. It's not like that they have an ounce of idea what fashion is all about. What other women think of my outfit is far more crucial. That's how I know how chic I look.

13. For some reason I always regret the fact that I was born long after my Pakistani grandpa on my mother side passed away. He fought in the WW2 alongside the Brits and that hows he came to (the then) Malaya, met my grandma and settle down. I always think that talking to him would a fascinating thing. Hearing all his war stories, his childhood stories in a distant land and all that. Unfortunately he passed away even before my parents were wed.

Atuk & Wan (grandpa & grandma) circa 1970s

I regret never knowing my grandpa. Though it is no fault of my own or anyone else's.



14. Every girl has a favourite Disney princess. Most of the time, for some reason or another it'll be Cinderella. Mine is not Cinderella. Mine is Snow White. Before this I though the reason why I like her so much is cause of the red lips, I have a penchant for red lipsticks anyways. But then I realise something, seeing that Snow White was released in the 1930s, the artwork that comes with the film Snow White is in tuned with that era.

You guys, Snow White looks like a pinup girl. No really. Google it up if you don't believe me.



15. Every year I will buy a little something for myself on my bDay. Sort of a self-pampering shit. Last year it was a handbag, before that a Shiseido lipstick, this year it is a book that I have been wanting for a long time.




16. One of my great interest, actually, love is....wait for it.......is history. I've always enjoyed history. All through highschool I consistently scored A's for history. I mean I'm flunking Maths, getting Bs for Biology but there never a time when I have anything less than an A for my history exams. In fact, I read history books for fun. I can tell you what the War of the Roses was all about, the founding of Melacca in a heartbeat, explain the rise and fall of the Roman Empire in great details.....cause I buy books about them. I spent countless hours reading about them online. I also religiously watch the History Channel, for fun.





In fact even the fiction books I read have an inclination to be historical. Historical crime, historical fantasy, historical high fantasy, historical romance, historical fiction...basically if it's historical you can bet your ass I will enjoy it. My favourites are 13th century Medieval England especially concerning Henry the 8th and his 6 wives, 14th Century Scotland, 1930's American (the Great Depression), books concerning the Holocaust are just fascinating, and Edwardian France. Those are good centuries to start with if you want to read anything historical.





In fact, this is the book I'm reading now:




The Autobiography of Henry VII: With Notes by His Fool, Will Somers .By Margaret George (994 pages)


It also has the honour of being the book I bought as a gift for myself, for my birthday. Now you know.


Oh wow, look 16 facts. Damn, I am too humble. Now I am tagging 15 of your asses.



1) Natalija

2) Frank

3) Aini

4) Melissa

5) Tine

6) Peter

7) Tinesh

8) Rujing

9) Technodoll

10) Michelle

11) Senorita

12) splatme

13) Kerp

14) Fara

15) And the last one is open for whoever that wants to do this.



Now go forth and be humble and modest, minions.

The 8

The Constantly Dramatic One have been tagged by Quin. Actually I think I have been tagged with this before but I couldn't be arsed into doing it. Now I could. Mainly because I'm procrastinating from doing the slides for my presentation. And study. And clean my room. And yeah, okay. You get the point. Onwards!



8 Things I Am Passionate About


1) My family.
They irritate the hell out of half the time. My sister can be such a condescending bitch. My brother yell at me on the phone -on long distance phone call, no less - all the way from Chicago. My mom nags incessantly. My Dad calls me at 11 fucking pm just to tell me to get home "right now". 11 fucking PM people and I'm already in my early twenties. Like what the fuck? But yet I love them all the same and I will beat the living shit of anyone that messes with any one of them.


2) Maintaining my friendship with the friends I love and care for no matter how far away they are from me.
My highschool bestfriend is in Ukraine studying medic. My brother in Chicago. I have friends leaving for the States. I have people whom I care for dearly scattered all over the world. I am determined to never lose contact with them.



3) Performance arts.

- Interpretive dance, musicals, theatres, films, etc


4) Ghendut.
No seriously, Ghendut. My golden hamster whom my friends think is either a depressed dog or a teddy bear. Ghendut is a golden hamster you bitches.
** "Ghendut" means "tubby" in Malay.


5) Making sure the penguins do not go into extinction.
Penguins are the world's most adorable creatures but their numbers is declining every year because of global warming and the fact that those sea lion bastards eat them. The only easy solution here is to stop global warming all together and club the sea lions to death. You heard it here first.

Sea lion bastards!

6) Sunflowers!
As in the flower itself and the term of endearment I use for my friends and loved ones.


7) History and culture.
Especially the ones that involves my own culture. I solely believe that young people these days no longer care about culture or tradition and have turn their backs on them. It is up to us, the young adults, to preserve our culture, customs and traditions. Being modern is good but not so much that you would turn back on your own traditions. I am determined to be one of those people who would bring my culture, the Malay culture to the 21st century so that it would never be forgotten - no matter how modern or Westernized we become.


8) Standing up for myself.
As a child I was bullied and walked all over on. Never again.



8 Things I Want to do Before I Die


1) A fireman/marine/sailor/pilot/S.W.A.T/ any variation of a hot guy in uniform.

2) Travel alone. With no company whatsoever. Preferably to either one of my top travel destinations: Mongolia or Tanzania. When I do this, and I will, hopefully I won't get kidnapped for human trafficking or get my organs harvested.

3) Hug an Emperor Penguin. No seriously, an Emperor Penguin. A real one.

4) Hit a nude beach.



5) Become an organ donor.

6) Be directly involve in a political revolution.

7) Spend one whole day in a sunflower field. I want to watch as the sunflowers follow the movement of the sun as it rises and sets on the same day.

8) Give a rousing speech to an audience of at least a thousand.


8 Things I Say Often

1) Seriously.
2) Bitch.
3) Like what the fuck?
4) I will smack that bitch until she/he bleeds.
5) Oh For the Love of God!
6) Sunflower!
7) Step on it you fucking asshole. I have places to be at.
8) This sucks donkey balls.

8 Books I've Recently Read

1) High Heels and Homicide (Kasey Michaels)

2) Diary of a Young Girl (Anne Frank)

3) Bapaku P. Ramlee (Nasir P. Ramlee) *Malay ***My father P.Ramlee

The late P.Ramlee. The greatest thing that had ever happened to the Malaysian movie industry.

4) Malaysian Politicians Say the Darndest Things (Amir Muhammad)

5) Life of Pi (Yann Martel)

6) 501 Must See Movies (Various Authors)

7) Schindler's List (Thomas Kenneally) - actually reading this one right now.

8) Agent Provocateur: Confessions. A collection of erotic fiction (Agent Provocateur)

8 Songs I Could Listen to Over and Over

1) You Can't Stop the Beat (from the musical Hairspray)

-just wanna get up and dance to this one. Each time.

2) No One Mourns the Wicked (from the musical Wicked)

- everytime I hear this, my heart skips a beat. It's like one of the most powerful songs I have ever heard. Plus it bring me back to that time when I watched the musical on Broadway in Chicago.

3) Kau Ilhamku (Man Bai) *Malay ***You are my inspiration

- everytime I got it bad for somebody, I can hear this song playing in my head. True story.

4) Ketipang Payung (from the classic "Nujum Pak Belalang") *Malay

- one of the best Malay songs ever, with ethnic beats and dance move. Before Rihanna, this lady was already singing about umbrellas (payung in Malay). I remember how I used to dance around to this song when I was kid, complete with my own umbrella. Check out the video!

5) Damelo (Juanes) **Spanish

- Juanes is a sexy beast who makes equally sexy music. Nuff' said.

6) Bitch (Meredith Brooks)

-"I'm a bitch, I'm a lover, I'm a child, I'm a mother, I'm a sinner, I'm a saint, I do not feel ashamed. I'm your hell, I'm you dream, I'm nothing in between. You know you wouldn't want it any other way."

7) Take Me of Leave Me (from the musical RENT)

- don't you love it when lesbians sing while arguing?

8) That's Amore (Dean Martin)

- timeless.


8 Things That Attract Me to My Best Friends

1) Honesty.

2) They have a certain aspect of them that I respect. I can only be with people whom I respect. So yes, I respect my friends. Every one of them.

3) The ability to bullshit creatively. Very important.

4) They are happy with themselves. Meaning they do not try to be anyone else but themselves.

5) Supportive.

6) Clever and witty.

7) Not desperate or/and conceited. I loathe desperate and conceited people.

8) A bunch of weirdos just like the Constantly Dramatic One.

I'm tagging Kerp. Coz he's a tag-whore.

Ohhhhh....Mr. Bennet.......

Now I know that I say I was gonna post my sister's nikah photos up, but the thing is we are still waiting for all the photos to be send to us. Also we only be getting the pics from the professional photographers in two weeks time. So be patient, I only want the best for you Drama Lovers.

So the day after the wedding, the Constantly Dramatic One was sitting downstairs, all alone and noticing for the first time how lonely the house feels without her....when Pride and Prejudice came on HBO. The one with Keira Knightley in it. In my opinion that bitch ruins that movie and Jane Austen would have a seizure in her grave if she knows that Knightley is playing her beloved Lizzie Bennet. I mean for the love of all that is holy- Lizzie was not a skinny anorexic bitch that unnecessarily pouts all the damn time. Why? Why does Knightley always have to make this face all the motherfucking time?


I mean I truly believe that she is indeed a beautiful woman. She has cheekbones that I would give my left butt cheek to have. Plus she is also smart and talented, which is something extraordinary in Hollywood these days. To actually be talented. So why bitch? Why? Why must you make that goddamn face all the time?

It makes me wanna smack you.
Until you bleed.
Seriously.


Anyways, moving on. The only reason I stayed on watching is because Mr.Darcy is dreamy. Grey Anatomy's fans claim that Doctor Shepard is McDreamy, no people. Mr.Darcy is the original McDreamy. It doesn't matter what form he comes in, who acts as him, Mr.Darcy is that one character that would eternally be dreamy. And in the wise words of Christina Aguilera "He's a one stop shop, makes the panties drop." - since 1813.





So anyways its been ages since I read the book or watched any of the movies when I realise something. Particularly bout Lizzie's parents: Mr. and Mrs.Bennet. Here is a couple that have been married for about.........20 odd years or so. And yet they call each other Mr. and Mrs. Bennet. I mean, they produced five daughters between them and yet they don't call each other by their first names. Do you see where I am going here? I mean, do you think that when they doing the nasty they call each other Mr and Mrs Bennet?


"Oooooh Mr. Bennet, yes yes yes YES!!!!"
"Oh Mrs. Bennet, you dirty, diiiiirrrty girl."
"Mrs. Bennet I can't stand it anymore, I have too....ooooohhh Mrs. Bennet!"

Kinky ain't it? Jane Austen, I bow down in wonder. I know if there is justice in this world, one day I would be sayin...

"OOhhh Mr.Owen, I do like it that way."

Stuff in my bag

I stole thing tag from Evie ages ago, we're talking way before the Chinese New Year and I still haven't got to it. On accounts that I am lazy. Plain and simple. The tag states that I need to list down six items in my bag - I say screw that. I wanna put up everything on the net coz on top of being constantly dramatic I am also an exhibitionist. But you know that already so here goes!

I took a pic of the stuff in my bag for your reading pleasure.

Dedication, I has it.

Item the 1st:
My orange Braun Buffel purse. To tell you the truth I don't really like it but Mom got it for me coz she thinks its funky being orange in colour and made out of leather. So now I lug around a purse that made out of a dead cow. It is very good though because its big I get to put in a whole lot of stuff in it and trust me, I have waaaaay too many discount cards. Its bright in colour so I don't lost it in the depths of the huge bags that I like so much. And its made out of leather so its tough. My mom is Mrs. Practicality.






Item the 2nd:
My ancient cell phone + extra battery (just in case). My phone is a Samsung SGH E 600C. When I bought it 4 years ago it was RM1,200....its probably around RM400 now. The only cool factor it has is that that it has a phonecam other than that - nothing. No mp3, no Bluetooth, nothing. But I have no intentions of replacing it. Its still in good condition and I'm not one of those gadget freaks that constantly need to update their phones. As long as I can call and text I'm good.... coz you see, the Constantly Dramatic One is old skool like that.





Item the 3rd:
Car keys. Self explanatory.





Item the 4th:
Sunglasses and well, glasses. Sunglasses are a must to shade my eyes while driving plus I can't drive without glasses anyways because I am nearsighted. I am so screwed if I forget to bring my glasses. Once I had to drive home without my glasses and that was without a doubt one of the scariest experience of my life.





Item the 5th:
Lipstick casing. I always have my lipbalm and whichever lipstick that I'm using in the case. Then I will have a lipgloss that matches the colour of the lipstick along with me. So my lipstick application steps are:

1) lipbalm to moisten the lips

2) put on the lipstick

3) the last step is to put the gloss in the middle of the upper and middle of the lips for that extra glamorous look.

Item the 6th:
Pepper spray. To spray any guy who wants to mess with me in the balls. Yes. In. The. Balls. Because it's sure as hell burns there as well.





Item the 7th:
Umbrella. This is a necessity because the college I go to only have open air car park. The umbrella is truly needed to protect my precious skin from the burning sun and to ensure that I do not get screwed if it starts raining.





Item the 8th:
Notebook. To jot down random thoughts throughout the day, make a list, pass notes in the class etc. Plus the cover is cute.




Item the 9th:
Current reading material.




So there you, stuff in my bag. And I'm sorry Evie to dissapoint but unfortunately I don't have a kitchen sink in my bag.And yes, that's my bedsheet you're looking at. It has hearts on it. I know. Pathethica. I'm not tagging anyone, feel free to steal it if you want too.

9 obscure things bout the Constantly Dramatic One

1) I once sat a bookstore for over two hours reading Marilyn Monroe's self-penned autobiography. I would buy the book, but its RM108 and I don't have the money for that.

2) If there is such thing as a next life, then I wish I would be born black. Black people are cool y'all.


3) I have decided. If all else fail in life, I will sit for the test and becomes a stock broker. High risk, high stress, living life on the edge...seems like something that would definitely suit me just fine.


4) I dream in colour and sound, sometimes I can even smell and touch. And when I wake up I can recall every single detail of the dream.


5) I will always feel inferior when it comes to my older sister.

6) I believe in the concept of soul mates. I am convinced that I will never find mine.


7) I wish my life is a musical. I wish I could just start singing for no reason whatsoever and then random strangers would just bust out in synchronized dance moves all around me.



8) My first crush was when I was about 6 years old. It was on Prince Eric from the Little Mermaid. I didn't know it was a crush then but looking back now, it was.




9) Frumpy people irritates the fuck out of me. If you can't dress yourself neatly then get out of my sight.

Book Club: Time Traveler's Wife (a.k.a artsy fartsy pseudo intellectual BS)

I went to my 1st ever Real book club the other day. When I say real, I mean as in real life and that I see the people face to face instead of discussing a book virtually online which I have done many, many times before. There are two reasons of why I actually attended the book club:

1. I was invited by a friend, she have invited me many times before but I just couldn't make it so since I could the other day so I went. Its all about good manners.
2. They were discussing the Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger which so happens to be one of my favourite book. Go check out my profile, its listed there.
   

I have to say discussing a book in real life is a whooole lot different from discussing it virtually. For instance, you have to think on your feet and bullshit your way through as fast as you could. Just sprout out any kind pseudo-intellectual bullshit and basically you covered. Well if the rest of the people in the club do not see through it, of course. Where else book discussions online you can do your research regarding the subject matter itself on the spot and then sprout out Super-Extra-pseudo-intellectual shit and look very intellectual on the matter. Which is of course bullshit on its on as well. Another thing I discovered is that, people who go for Book Clubs are snobs- artsy fartsy snobs, intellectual snobs, whatever snobs but when it boils down to it, still a snob. Since I went for it and planning to go for the next meeting, that makes me a snob too.

A pseudo-intellectual artsy fartsy snob (aka full of shit).

That's me.

I can like make some very bitchy statement about one person that get on my nerves during the whole book club, I could. But I fear that the said person could find my blog and then I will be fucked.

I am a pussy.

But really dude, if this person rolls their eyes more during the discussion and smirks whenever someone else voice out their opinion of the book- like our opinions doesn't matter- I could like grab the nearest fork around and stab the said person in the eyes with it. Goddamn annoying.

Other people have their opinion. We voice it out. That's the whole point of a book club. Not your eye-rolling/smirking-think-you're-waaaay-smarter-than-the-rest-of-mankind-plus-Einstein-put-together-club. Okay? Ass.

Anyways, after the book club has ended, I began talking crap with my friend and her sister, who were both lovers of the written words and also happen to be in their 40ties. Yes, I make friends with older people. We laugh, we chatted and in the process they passed me their business cards and I, being me, just slipped them in my bag without even glancing at it. Its not when I'm at home and cleaning out my bag that I notice the cards...

The names of my new found friends were written and then their position and then the education level that they have achieved. And that's when I realised that for the whole evening I was talking crap with PhD HOLDERS. PhD. These people have PhD and I was talking crap with them! Me! I don't even have a friggin degree (technically I am in college and working on that but yeah ok, you get my point right?) and I was talking crap with super intelligent people. Talk about intimidating...

Come to think about it, the book club was on a Friday night and I could have actually went out and get trashed beyond my mind with my friends, people who are off my age and are not PhD holders but instead I chose to be in an uppity coffee shop, sipping lattes and discussing books...

WTH is up with that?!

Even I dunno why I did it. For the next book club, they are goin to discuss "The Sailor who fell from Grace with the Sea" by Yukio Mishima San. Apparently it is a Japanese classic that have been translated into English...I dunno whether or not to participate in the next meeting coz I swear that the title alone is already giving me a headache.

Anyways, now that I have (generally) finish bitching about it- go read the Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger.

Its awesome.