A (partial) list of hot men as according to the Constantly Dramatic One...

I have been tagged by Gypsy, who y'all should know by now is the Constantly Dramatic One's bestfriend all the way from the schooling years. And woman have to tag me with what I am declaring as the most DIFFICULT tag imaginable in the history of the blogsphere. Seriously. I'm supposed to list down the 10 hottest men as according to me. Its kinda tough when I have like 50 dudes all over the place.....Took me ages to come down with the top ten.

It was painful having to leave some out. Gut wrenching, heart breaking....... but it has too be done to honour the tag. Also I honestly have nothing else to do...actually I have to clean my room but fuck that shit. So I present to you:

A (partial) list of hot men as according to the Constantly Dramatic One!!

Number 10.

Iker Casillas of Real Madrid.

The first time I saw super hottie Iker Casillas was on the massive screen in the stadium. The year was 2002 and my family and I was in Suwon, South Korea - Fifa World Cup 2002 bitches. Ireland VS Spain game of which Spain totally pwned Ireland in the knockout stage.

Have you heard of the saying "Football is a beautiful game"? Yeah....looking at Iker I completely understand why they say that.

Age: 27
Ass status: Super tight. I mean c'mon, he is an athlete.
Super Hot YouTube video: *click*

Number 9.

Sean Bean

Ahhhhh....... Sean Bean. You might not be familiar with this British badass coz he isn't all that famous. Mostly plays the second fiddle to the leading man or the sophisticated villain. Last seen with Nicholas Cage in National Treasure. And oh yeah, he was also Boromir in Lord of the Rings. He was the star of his own TV series, Sharpe (1993-2006) in which he struts around in a period military uniform and makes all the panties drop.

For me....its not really the face, its more like the voice. Dude have the manliest voice I have ever heard. I have a couple of his movies on DVD and I just let it play to hear his voice. Sexiest voice evvveeeeeeerrr. I could burst a blood vessel just listening to his voice.

Age: 50 (Kinda creepy coz he's uuhh....as old as my mom.....I think I should seek psychiatrist help one of these days....)

Ass status: Not tight but he's old so.......

Super hot youTube video:*click*

Number 8.

Keegan Micheal Key

Basically a new discovery. I have been obsessively watching MADtv videos on youTube which also explains the lack of updates. Keegan Michael Key is one of the funniest and talented cast member of the current MADtv cast and he always cracks me up. A man with a sense of humour is indeed a sexy man.

Age: 36
Ass status: Its okay......
Super hot youTube video: None, but there are some really funny ones. And my favourite is this one where he is pretending to be a fake African. Its hilarious. Check it out!

Number 7.

Juanes

First and foremost Juanes is a musician, a very talented musician. His uber hotness comes from his unmistakable passion for music. You can feel that passion in every song that he sings. And I say that from a view point of someone who speaks no word of Spanish. When you don't understand the language, you enjoy the beats, the flow but most of all what attracts me to any kind of music is the passion conveyed by the singer. And Juanes have truckloads of that.


Passionate, talented and I did mention he's a rock star right?

Age: 35
Ass status: Very niiiiiceeeee....

Super hot youTube video: A whole lot but this is the link to my favourite song of his; A Dios Le Pido

Number 6.

Ralph Fiennes

Most people pronounces his name as well, "Ral-ph Fien-nes" but in actually you pronounce it as "Rafe Fine" and indeed he is ffffiiiiiinnnneeeeee. Suave and sensual are the words to describe Mr.Fiiiinnnee. And oh yeah, that's also that little thing about him. You know that little thing of looking smoking hot in a uniforms. Schindler's List anyone?


I want to lock him up in my closet and make him my play thing.

Now you know.



Age: 45
Ass status: Dunno. Too fixated with his eyes.
Super hot youTube video: *click*

And we're done with the first part. Stay tuned with the second part and yes Clive Owen is in there somewhere. Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out.

To be continued............

27 donkey balls

27 Dresses sucks donkey balls. There I say it. Definite spoiler ahead, please don't read if you think of wasting your time on this movie sometime in the future. Let the bitching commence!

So there's a chick. Her name is Jane. She really likes weddings. Weddings is her "calling". She says that in the beginning of the movie just because of something that happened when she was 8 years old. A cousin who happens to be a bride ripped her dress and she helped the bride fixed it hence she found her calling as bridesmaid. She even likened herself to the likes of Picasso, Mozart and all the other musical greats.

Bitch please. You just sew the dress back on with a ribbon.

And who finds her calling as bridesmaid? Honestly. If you like weddings so much than become a wedding planner since through the movie all she does is plans the wedding for the brides. She does all the planning -without payment and out of the kindness of her heart- all 27 weddings. Doormat much?

You know which part of the movie is the moment that I realized that I just wasted 1 1/2 hours of my life? When she, Jane attended two weddings a night. As the bridesmaid. Oh of course there's nothing wrong with that but guess what it was Christian wedding and an Indian wedding in a night. So she struck the deal with the cab driver $300 if he would just cater her up and down from both weddings. She will cut 20bucks each time he looks behind as she is changing.

So this woman, took off her dress and go stark naked in the back of a cab and trusted that the cab driver to not look. She also changed from a dress into a sari in the back of the cab.

Changed into a sari. At the back of a cab.

Yeah right. Please I know there is such a thing as suspension of disbelief. I give you that. But changing into a sari at the back of a cab is just pushing it. First of have you ever worn a sari? I haven't but I seen people do. And trust me, its a bitch. It requires at least 2 people to tie it properly for you and it also requires the person in the sari to be standing up. So how that woman managed to change into a sari at the back of the cab and come off looking pristine is beyond me. And who the fuck goes naked at the back of a cab?

Pssssss babes, You're wearing the sari backwards.

Lets examine this. A man is driving the cab. A man that is a complete stranger. And then you come in and stripped at the back of the cab. Excuse me! Are you insane?!! Do you wanna get raped? Weren't this shot in New York? Like which crazy bitch stripped at the back of a cab and thinks its all fine and dandy? Stupid bitch, he could have drove you anywhere and then call his buddies up and the next day you will be in front of the paper "Stupid bitch gang raped by cab drivers. Body found in a torn sari by the Manhattan river".

And oh get this, Katherine Heigl who looks like this:

Plays the dumpy sister. Now lets just scroll back up to the picture above and think about that again.......

You can of course say "CD, she's just acting. That's what she do. She's an actress." Now, see... I know that. I am after all a student of the mass communication lore. That is of course speaking logically. But fuck that shit. If she is the dumpy sister, than WHAT THE HELL AM I?!! Have you seen my sister? Have you seen me? Oh woe self esteem, where have you gone too? Fucking Hollywood. Giving me inferior complex.

Fuck you Hollywood!! Fuck you!

Screw this. I'm not eating till next Thursday.

Stalking pays

Remember my ULTIMATE FRENEMY from highschool? Yeah, that bitch. She's back from Europe to visit her family and she gave me a call asking if I wanna meet up this Friday.



See, normally I would have told her no on accounts that I hate her and that if she were caught in a burning building, instead of calling the fire brigade I will pull up a chair, and have popcorn as I watch the building burn down and cackles everytime I hear her screams from within. My hate have no boundaries. For the record, the Constantly Dramatic One is not nice. Just so you know.



But the thing is.........I have been stalking her blog now for awhile. And I know for a fact that she is having a shitty time in Europe. She only have one friend. She's bored there. She always blog about how lonely she is. And that she thinks her life is going nowhere. All these dreadful entries..... This is for all those years you fuck around with people lives back in highschool woman. Karma is indeed a bitch ain't it?



So I'm eager to see if she was just as pretentious and desperate for attention as she was back in the day. I wanna meet her so that she could lie to me about how great her life is when for a fact I know she doesn't have one. I want her to speak with a European accent when I know she blogs about how European people cannot understand her when she speaks. I wanna hear about all the places she visited in Europe, when she blogs about how she is always stuck in the house. I wanna hear all that. I won't call out on her lies. I will be sarcastic.

Then I will meet up with my friends from highschool who hate her equally and have new stuff to bitch about.Because that's how we roll.



I do know however that she went to Kanye West's concert. She had like 3 massive entries about that. Bet bitch gonna talk about that. No matter, I can just say that I think Kanye is an asshole and that people who listens to hiphop are very sad. It's sad because there is no depth in those music and its utterly shameful that women are into it as well. All these songs ever do is objectifiying women. Strip them out of their rights as human beings and label women as mere sex objects. And then I will look condescendingly at her while I sip my cafe' latte. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!



She of course doesn't need to know how I sing and dance to Flo Rida's Low and how my friends and I sing This Is Why I'm Hot everytime we karaoke. She also doesn't need to know that I still sleep with stuff toys. I'm supposed to be more matured and worldly then her people. Work with me.



Also need to look super cute this Friday. It's imperative that I look cuter than her.



Must. Look. Super. Cute.



Shit, I cannot buy any new outfits. It had been 2 months and 9 days now since I last shopped. Promised the Parental Units not to shop till June. Fuck. This is bad. I have to wear the clothes I already have, accessorize to glam it up. What to wear? What to wear? A LBD is pushing it. We're meeting for coffee people. Damn, what to wear? What to wear? This is crucial. I will put on some outfits, take pictures and let my Style Counsellors decide. And when I say Style Counsellors I mean 3kc and Cheesecakeerian. And maybe Tinesh coz he's a girl too.


And maybe I should stop at Benefit's counter for a makeover....Meet up with her with 3 inch of makeup on my face. AHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAH! Okay, that's truly pushing it. But whatever it is: MUST. LOOK. CUTE.

Cuter than that bitch anyways...

Update

Ultimate Frenemy texted me saying she might not be able to make it. What the fuck??????????????? This is bullshit.

Dear Clive, why are you so hot?

Dear Clive,

I came home today after a long day in college of talking shit and well, more talking shit and basically I'm beat. I thought I'll get online and get some school work done but then I stumbled upon these pictures of you on Jezebel.com and Holy Mother of God...........

Let me touch you.

Intimately.

All over.

Thinking of nasty, naaaasty thoughts of you tonight,

The Constantly Dramatic One.

Ohhhhh....Mr. Bennet.......

Now I know that I say I was gonna post my sister's nikah photos up, but the thing is we are still waiting for all the photos to be send to us. Also we only be getting the pics from the professional photographers in two weeks time. So be patient, I only want the best for you Drama Lovers.

So the day after the wedding, the Constantly Dramatic One was sitting downstairs, all alone and noticing for the first time how lonely the house feels without her....when Pride and Prejudice came on HBO. The one with Keira Knightley in it. In my opinion that bitch ruins that movie and Jane Austen would have a seizure in her grave if she knows that Knightley is playing her beloved Lizzie Bennet. I mean for the love of all that is holy- Lizzie was not a skinny anorexic bitch that unnecessarily pouts all the damn time. Why? Why does Knightley always have to make this face all the motherfucking time?


I mean I truly believe that she is indeed a beautiful woman. She has cheekbones that I would give my left butt cheek to have. Plus she is also smart and talented, which is something extraordinary in Hollywood these days. To actually be talented. So why bitch? Why? Why must you make that goddamn face all the time?

It makes me wanna smack you.
Until you bleed.
Seriously.


Anyways, moving on. The only reason I stayed on watching is because Mr.Darcy is dreamy. Grey Anatomy's fans claim that Doctor Shepard is McDreamy, no people. Mr.Darcy is the original McDreamy. It doesn't matter what form he comes in, who acts as him, Mr.Darcy is that one character that would eternally be dreamy. And in the wise words of Christina Aguilera "He's a one stop shop, makes the panties drop." - since 1813.





So anyways its been ages since I read the book or watched any of the movies when I realise something. Particularly bout Lizzie's parents: Mr. and Mrs.Bennet. Here is a couple that have been married for about.........20 odd years or so. And yet they call each other Mr. and Mrs. Bennet. I mean, they produced five daughters between them and yet they don't call each other by their first names. Do you see where I am going here? I mean, do you think that when they doing the nasty they call each other Mr and Mrs Bennet?


"Oooooh Mr. Bennet, yes yes yes YES!!!!"
"Oh Mrs. Bennet, you dirty, diiiiirrrty girl."
"Mrs. Bennet I can't stand it anymore, I have too....ooooohhh Mrs. Bennet!"

Kinky ain't it? Jane Austen, I bow down in wonder. I know if there is justice in this world, one day I would be sayin...

"OOhhh Mr.Owen, I do like it that way."

Love is her dress

Okay before anything else, did you guys saw the Oscars last night? I saw the live telecast at 10am Malaysian time. I'm not gonna make any comments about the show other than the fact that I'm thankful Keira Knightley wasn't there, I hate her snooty face but I luuuurrrrvvvve, lurrrrrrrrrrrrrveeeeeeeeeee this dress. Best Actress winner Marion Cotillard is also the best dressed. Check it!

So exquisite. So different. So Old Hollywood Glam. I love love love luuurrrrrrrrveeeeee!!!! Damn, I wish I could wear this for my sister's wedding. I will wear it all the time. To class, to the gym, when I go frolicking around in the sun. Everywhere. And then at night I take it off, hang it on its shrine and worship its fabulousness.

I would totally do that. Seriously.

You made a what now?

So today I was in college right.... I mean that's what I do, the Constantly Dramatic One is a college student. I was dressed like a college student, I was carrying college books, I was thinking of my assignments when I received a text message from a friend saying that they all hanging out at the study area. Basically the study area is the 4th level of the building where students go to chill in between classes. Plus it's fully air-conditioned and has wireless. Good times.

When I got this message I was at level 1 meaning I have to climb the damn stairs to get to level 4. Usually I opt for an illegal ride on the emergency elevator but today, today I was channeling 80es Jane Fonda and I wanna feel the muscle burn. Yes, I will. I will feel it burn as I drag my giant ass all the way from the 1st floor to the 4th floor. Feel it CD, feeeeeel it buuuurrrrn.

By the time I got to third floor I was basically huffing and puffing and there were too many goddamn stairs. I was cursing it under my breath when I heard a thud and there was a cry from some chick. Apparently some chick has fallen on her ass. Yeah, okay. Funny shit but it happens. I bet her ass is hurting but I was too preoccupied with the pain in my kidney when I heard what she said next:

"Ouch! I made a boo boo!"..............................................................................................................................................................................

....................................................................................................

What in the fucking blue hell bitch?!!! You made a boo boo? I almost trip up the stairs listening to your impressive vocab! I almost made my own boo boo. Are you seriously fucking with me? Excuse me? You made a boo boo? What the fuck?!!

Okay let's recap. Bimbo landed on her ass. Bimbo hurt her ass. And then she proclaimed to her friends that she made a boo boo?...............................Excuse me? I am in college aren't I? Where there is actually a grade point average to be qualified to enroll? And you said you made a boo boo? Whhhhaaaaaaaaat?!!! Seriously listening to those words coming out of your mouth has lower my IQ by 78%. I am amazed that I could even type this shit out right now.

I look at you and I'm thinking you're what? 19? 20? That means you are old enough to have your reproductive organs to be working. That means you are old enough to actually expend your vocab while you were living your life in the past 18 or 19 years or so. I mean, this is just guessing work but I'm gonna make an educated guess that in the past 18 or 19 years or so that you would have pick up something to read. Like a cereal box.

Seriously. What kind of piece of shit remark is that? "I made a boo boo." I understand that you might be embarrassed seeing that you landed on your ass in front of people. I understand that you feel the need to cover that embarrassment. Unfortunately your need to cover your embarrassment is that for you to act cute. And for you to act cute is for you to use babyish words like that. Sweetie, I got news for you. Once you hit the 10 year old mark, using the phrase "I made a boo boo" is no longer cute. It just makes you seem retarded. While we're on the topic, did you Father drop you on your head when you were a baby coz that would explain things.

And also it wont pissed me off to the core knowing that the girls that I share my tertiary education with are a bunch of weaklings that like playing it dumb to get guys attention. So you fell down, it’s embarrassing. I get it. Pick yourself back up, says it hurts and then hold your head up high. Don't be a fucking retard by using dumbass words like that.

Today I am embarrassed to be a woman. You know why? Because of you. Because of your need to act helpless and cute when shit like this happen. Feminism is set back by decades by bimbos like you who likes to play dumb. And while we're at it, lemme guess your role model is Jessica Simpson right?

Jim Carrey should not have nude scenes

I just watched the movie The Number 23.







I don't get why so many people criticize it for being crap. It's not that bad. It tries to be clever but in the end it all falls apart. The first half was good, the second half of the movie felt rushed and contrive. Also its kinda disturbing that it involves a whole lot of sex scenes. Jim Carrey sex scenes. You read that right.

Jim Carrey. Sex scenes.

When you seen Jim Carrey's ass thrusting out a couple of times, trust me on this; you will lose faith in humanity. My fucking eyes hurt.

But I'm not here to talk about the movie. Or the fact that the Constantly Dramatic One is now scarred for life from seeing Jim Carrey's white skinny ass in multiple sex scenes, I'm here to talk about the ending.........At the end of the movie you see the Bible reading from Numbers 23:32 .........



"Be sure that your sins will find you out."



I guess I'm fucked then for I have sin.

And seen Jim Carrey's ass. Multiple times.

1979 - 2008

RIP

Heath Ledger

1979 - 2008

I would write more on how I think you were one of the few Hollywood stars that actually have talent. I would write how Brokeback Mountain is a great love story and that it makes me cry every time you scream "I don't know how to quit you!". I would write how fun you were to watch in Casanova alongside Charlie Cox. I would write how much I look forward to watching you play the Joker in the new Batman installment. I would write all that but for reasons that remain unknown, words are elusive to me these days.

So I say this: RIP Heath.

9 obscure things bout the Constantly Dramatic One

1) I once sat a bookstore for over two hours reading Marilyn Monroe's self-penned autobiography. I would buy the book, but its RM108 and I don't have the money for that.

2) If there is such thing as a next life, then I wish I would be born black. Black people are cool y'all.


3) I have decided. If all else fail in life, I will sit for the test and becomes a stock broker. High risk, high stress, living life on the edge...seems like something that would definitely suit me just fine.


4) I dream in colour and sound, sometimes I can even smell and touch. And when I wake up I can recall every single detail of the dream.


5) I will always feel inferior when it comes to my older sister.

6) I believe in the concept of soul mates. I am convinced that I will never find mine.


7) I wish my life is a musical. I wish I could just start singing for no reason whatsoever and then random strangers would just bust out in synchronized dance moves all around me.



8) My first crush was when I was about 6 years old. It was on Prince Eric from the Little Mermaid. I didn't know it was a crush then but looking back now, it was.




9) Frumpy people irritates the fuck out of me. If you can't dress yourself neatly then get out of my sight.