So...umm....FML

He’s gay!!!'

He’s gay!!!

Remember Geek Boy, who played me like the fool that I was…..and then he wanted to meet me and then I stood him up? He’s gay!!

He’s gay!!!

The guy that I was smitten with and picked over a military man, who is hot and who wanted to fuck me 7 ways till Wednesday, is gay. He’s gay!! I was so into this guy. I was so messed up when he played me. I didn’t cry though, thank God. The moment you cry over a man, huney, you lose. But still, I was really messed up. And now I found out. He’s gay.

Oh my god!!

No wonder I was rejected!! I don’t have a dick. You guys know what this means right? It’s not me he rejected. It’s my lack of dick!

Okay, okay…let me just take it from the top.

I have a MSN. And even though I deleted him off my list, the dude is still on my network. My MSN network. And I was looking at my MSN network and I saw his new updates and it went something like this

“Woo hoo! Having a great time in San Francisco!”

First of, the fuck is doing in San Francisco? Right. So I buzzed a mutual friend of ours…who did not delete his Facebook page as I did. A bit of pleading, a bit of bribing and then I got my friend’s Facebook password so that I can go snoop around Geek Boy’s page, under my friend’s account.

So he is in San Francisco. He transferred his final year credit and doing it there. Fine. Whatever. Not that I am jealous or anything like that. Cause I never been to San Francisco and always wanted to and now he’s there. Fine, whatever. Then I look at his photos. And there are a lot of photos of him with one guy. Hugging. Sitting together. Partying. Just that one guy. Okay, say bromance or whatever…but it looks more then platonic okay. It looks more like Frodo Baggins and Samwise Gamgee "platonic" bromance. It looks………………..different.

Curious.

So I went to his info page.

Interested in: Relationships with men and women. And then like 5 groups about being bisexual.

Ladies, just like Carrie Bradshaw said- being bisexual just means you’re not ready to come out fully out of the closet yet. And the clincher, he’s on Level 4 of the Supermodel game. No self respecting straight man plays that game. Even I don’t play that game.

Am I reaching here?

And then all his little quirks and the conversation came back. The overtly neat things, the interest in theatre, and the fucking tight pants and oh this one time he told me:

“Oh I’m kinda weird. I like a lot of things that women like. I guess that’s why we can get along so well.”

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Yeah, take your time. It took me half a year to figure it out. And henceforth, I shall rename myself. I will no longer be the Constantly Dramatic One. I will be “the Dumb Beyatch who Dates Gay Guys”.

Jesus fucking Christ, how could I not see this? Why was I so blinded? Am I reaching here?

I had a thing for a gay dude…or at least a sexually-confused dude AND THEN at-least-sexually-confused-dude played me and now, he’s in motherfucking San Francisco having butt sex with some American and waving the gay pride flag during Mardi Gras!

This is bullshit. My life is bullshit. It’s a whole lot of bullshit that been thrown together and labelled as my life.

But hey, at least it’s not me. I mean, it’s not my fault I’m not a gay man. And have awesome tits and a working vagina instead of a dick. If I ever meet him again…I will let him know that what happened was okay and give him a hug….and then we can go shopping together.

After all….every fag needs a hag.