Omg, fucken kill me.
So I went for a run this morning. It started raining. Continued running in rain, feeling completely badass while looking at weak-ass sissies all sheltered in their car. Hah! You ain't as badass as I am. Look at me! Look at me all wet and running even in this weather. Be in awe of my awesomeness! Be inspired by my wet body indiscernible from sweat and rain water! Be inspired, bitches!!
Got home, feeling all superior. And knowing that my housemates won't be home at this time of day, I thought it would be completely okay to strip down to my sports bra as I entered the house cause my shirt is hella wet and I don't wanna get pneumonia. After all, we all collectively know each other's schedule now and this is an all-girls house. Should be fine, right? Riiiigggghhht?!!
Walk in the house while simultaneously pulling said wet shirt off me. Heard voices. Look up. Three guys I have never seen in my entire fucking life was sitting in the living room.
“Hi” shirt still halfway off my body.
“We're Bitchface McGee's friends”
“Oh. I live here.”
“I'm just gonna go inside my room now.”
Awkwardly made way to room. By this time all the guys were grinning. Bastards! Baaaastards!
“I like your sports bra. Pretty.”
I just did a striptease for my asshole housemate friends you guys. It does not get any lower than this. Just fucken kill me now.
Just fucken kill me now and get it over and done with.