Un-friending Facebook

I’ve quit Facebook.

No seriously. For the time being. I do not know how long. I will be back though; I have exactly 1,451 pictures as well as 35 albums on the site. Have to transfer all that before I could completely quit it.

The decision to do was at first out of necessity- ie: shitload of assignments, getting to distracted with cyber stalking people etc. It was supposed to be a temporary thing. But now that I haven’t logged in for approximately for 12 days, and suffering no drawbacks, asphyxiation or hives from lack of wasting time on said social network....I am actually feeling really good about it.

I’m tired of the fuckery that goes on it.

I’m tired of people from my past that I never liked and never wanted to have a thing to do with sending me friend requests out of nowhere. I mean, honestly asswipe, I didn’t like you then, what makes you think that I would now? I’m tired of people sending me friend requests without even a cursory “hey” on my wall. Thanks so much for making me part of your loser-rific never-ending quest of looking super awesome online by having lots of “friends”. When I see people with 90 friends or something, I immediately think “at least dude is keeping it real” but when I seem someone with 500+ something friends and I’m like “Wow. Douchebag.” I’m tired of random guys from Romania trying to add me just cause I look “hot” on my profile photo (which I no longer have the option to hide from people who are not my “friends”. Thanks for that Zuckerberg).

I’m tired of people blowing up their own ass.

“Oh wow, the job interview went so awesome and obviously I’m the best candidate cause it’s me!”

“Should I buy the Mercedes or the Lambo? With my new pay, I could certainly afford both. Lol.”

“Me and the hubby are now in Cannes! It’s so glamorous. Next week Milan!”

Fucking blow me assholes.

I’m tired of overzealous religious people on FB.

“Allah is always in my mind, my heart, my soul. Alhamdullilah.”

“Jesus is the way.”

Now this would have been okay if I did not just saw you wearing a low cut top that drop down to your navel last week with boobs all-galore. Was Allah in your mind, your heart and your soul as you sat on the bar, boobs all hanging out while making out with some random guy? And oh, did Jesus showed you the way last night when you were fucking wasted out of your mind and still wanted to drive home on your own? Did Jesus said it was okay to drive that car after you knocked back 7 shots of whisky? Did he?

Pretentious fuckwits.

I’m tired of people from my past going “Wow, you look so good now...considering how you used to look like in highschool.” I mean, whoa dude, kudos for the backhanded compliment. That takes some skills. And yes I realize high school for me was 5 years worth of bad haircut. I still cringe looking at the photos. What in the fucking blue hell was I thinking? But wow, asshole. Thanks but no thanks.

I’m just tired of it all. Maybe this is me being old. Me being in my quarter life crisis. Or maybe this is just me just sick being reminded of my fleeting youth whenever I log onto that site. I am at that age where my goddamn school friends are getting married, left right front and centre. Goddamn wedding invitations every other week. The girls I went to school are not discussing the price of wedding planners on their walls. A part of me is slightly jealous that I have no one, but a bigger part of me is repulsed that they dare to get married Before establishing careers they could be proud of. But then feminism is about choice. And if they choose to settle down now who am I to say anything? And then I become completely ashamed for feeling that motherhood isn’t a good enough life choice, after all, my mom chose to be a homemaker and raised me. And then I feel guilty about it....and its all very conflicted.

And the fuck up part of it is that it’s all in my head. When I said quarter life crisis, I kid you not, bitches.

Also I met a guy the other day. We talked. It was nice. Then when it was coming to an end he asked me “Can I add you on Facebook?” Gone are the days of “Can I have your number?” Or maybe that’s just me. When I told him that I’ve deactivated mine, he stared at me like I’m insane. This is how it is. You need to be FB friends to “get to know” the person before actually “knowing” the person the traditional way. FB creepin is the way into the future folks.

I guess it’s good that I no longer have one. Make me slightly unique in this digital driven world. Or just a loser.

A loser in the midst of her quarter life crisis.