You guys….I think I’m gonna be homeless when I reach
The university that I’m going to is supposed to provide accommodation for me. I put in the application late October, they emailed me mid-Nov saying that my form has been received and ever since then I haven’t heard a thing. Bitches, I’m flying off early February….and today is already January 19th. 19!!!!! I’m worried sick okay. I mean, I don’t have a plan B. It’s not like if I don’t live on-campus, I can get something off-campus just like that. What the fuck? The flight tickets been paid for, my things are almost sorted (I’m still debating the shoes thing), my parents is throwing a kenduri doa selamat for me next week and I don’t have a room!!!!
What bullshit is this?
You know I’ve emailed them twice in regards of the room. I don’t mind if they don’t give me a fucking room but for the love of all that is pure and true, just tell already whether or not I get it therefore if I don’t- I can start looking in for off-campus accommodation. What if I find an off-campus place and pay the deposit and those assholes over at the uni mailed me saying that I do get a room. Like wtf? Isn’t that a waste of money? Paid deposit for both places but I can only live at one. I am not made of money people. I do not shit diamonds okay. I don’t make 50k a month that I can throw money around just like that. I’m unemployed!
Them assholes are screwing with me.You know….I don’t mind if they just come out straight and send me an email somewhere along these lines:
Dear Ms. Drama,
Though we are glad that you have chosen our university to further your education and we dooooo love getting your father’s hard-earned money, we are afraid we won’t be able to let you live on-campus. Now we don’t want you to misunderstood that this means we like your money any less, it’s just that our rooms are small and we can’t find one that can fit your humongous ass.....shapely behind. The thing is Ms. Drama, we’re sure that somehow your…..shapely behind will not be able to fit through the door frame. We here hope that you do not take this personally.
Yours sincerely,
Dipshit McGee
Manager of Accommodations,
Although if they do send me this email, I will sue them bastards. Discrimination against people with giant asses is not openly talk about but it exists. Trust me, I know. But really, I’m for real here. I’m worried as fuck. I dunno about you guys but I am accustomed to having a roof over my head. What if I go there and I have to live by a dumpster or something? I’m taking my golden hamster with me. What if he meet the rats at the dumpster, join their gang and become wild? What then?!!! I will fail as a mother then cause my baby join a gang! I cannot have that. I will not let society judge my motherly skills. I will not.
But back to this homeless issue. I’m worried. Now I know there’s that saying…. “Worry will not add another minute to your life.” Yes, I know that. But the point is you’re not the one that’s going to be homeless. I am. Or have your precious golden hamster joining a gang of rats and terrorizing the whole neighbourhood while you sit by the dumpster worrying sick that your baby ain’t home yet while trying to write a 10,000 word paper due tomorrow at 8am. Stop smirking. This is a possible case scenario.
I also believe this-not-getting-a-room fuckery is karma. The universe is screwing with me cause I haven’t been pulling my weight at home. I’m such a bitch these days. Like I don’t make up my own bed or clean the table after dinner anymore and when my mom yells at me I go “Why are you yelling at me? I’m leaving soon and still you’re yelling at me?” and then I make this super sad face, like I-can’t-believe-you’re-yelling-at-me-when-I-am-leaving-soon-Don’t-you-love-me? Then she let me slide and I don’t have to do chores. After that I run into my room and laugh my evil Mojo Jojo laugh cause I don’t have to do the dishes. Reverse psychology is your friend…or so I thought. Until this room thing come about and everything makes sense. Karma.
Reverse psychology your parents + get out of washing the dishes = Homeless in
It makes total sense when you can get your head around it.....
