Monday, March 26, 2007

Defensive driving in Malaysia- an elaborate joke.

According to, Malaysia will implement a new criteria in driving school and that is to acquire 'defensive driving' qualification before they could even dream of passing the driving test... okay first thought when i read this was that this shit is hilarious. Coz you know, Malaysian drivers are like psychos and who gives a fuck about 'defensive driving'? After i rolled around on the floor laughing my ass of i realised something else...there is a conspiracy at hand here and they are actually writing this article for me...yeah. Me. Apparently word have got out that i got road rage.


Anyways, i found sooo many amusing quotes that i just have to share. I mean, its hilarious:

“Malaysian drivers are not good in safety routines,” he said. “They don't even stop to look left and right or look in the rear view mirror. "

Okay first of all that's BS okay, if they do not look left and right then we will having accidents ALL the time, as it stands we only have accidents half of the time. I mean i can honestly speak for the right of Malaysian drivers, especially the F1 wannabes out there that we do look in the mirror...sometimes. Therefore i think that its completely unjustified of them to stereotype people just like that. Its uncalled for. I for one am insulted. Insulted i tell you.

“They are also bad in giving ample time to others and this is an example of non-defensive driving."

Bad in giving ample time to others? Okay this one i agree with coz i think the hidden meaning in this context is that people just don't signal before turning into a junction. Yes, you know who you are, you Bastards. Fortunately i am not one of them, this of course is not because i was born into being a law-abiding-citizen-driver but because when i first started driving and my mom was training me she always scream at me when i didn't signal. And whenever i don't signal these days i can still hear her screams....

"“Maybe these drivers just never realised how simple it is to avoid accidents.”

Dude, that statement is too stupid, I'm not even gonna comment on it. Honestly.

AND now for the finale, the best and the most hilarious thing i have heard this whole month...drum roll please....

"“We want a culture of defensive driving in Malaysians, which means everyone who drives will have safety as a priority – and not only when there is a traffic policeman present ,” he added. "

Its the last part that kills me all the time: “– and not only when there is a traffic policeman present". HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! THAT'S TOO FUNNY!!! i mean i know its true but that's the irony in it ain't it? Yeah we Malaysian drivers only behaved when we see the policemen but do stupid road rage shit when they're not around. I'm not saying that they way Malaysian drives drive are right but its the way we drive that's also a part of our culture that all of us could agree on other than our love for Mamak food. I dunno about you guys, but whenever i hear a foreigner say that it gives him the hibbie-jibbies to drive on Malaysian road on account of how We makes me proud.


trixie said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
patricia said...

wahahahaha!!! policeman comment was funny!!!

yes. malaysian road is crazy!! but i shall conquer it eventually!! i tell you!!! This. Is. SPAAAR-TAA!!

FAVZ1 said...

Ngahahaha!! "Go to Hell Driving" is way much cooler and better than "Defensive Driving".

Flavia said...

"And whenever i don't signal these days i can still hear her screams...."

Have the lambs stopped screaming Clarice?

(A 'Silence of the a Lambs' reference there...if you do not get it I recommend that you get an AUTHENTIC copy of the DVD at Tower Records...or Speedy Video...or something like that)