Thursday, June 19, 2008

Sleep with the fishes

I have been getting weird phone calls out of late. I think its mostly wrong numbers but really, its getting to me.

I loathe random perverted messages. Truly. Like this one time it was around 2 in the morning and I was watching CSI: Las Vegas Season 2 on DVD. Thinking that its all kinds of wrong to be attracted to Grissom when the phone rang. I answered and there was heavy breathing on the other end. And then somebody yells out like he got an orgasm.


There will always be perverts who would just be pressing some numbers in the early mornings. If you're at the other end, hanging up and moving on with life is the best bet. And you know what else pisses me off? People calling you and then asking you who you are. What the fuck is that? You call me, you worthless piece of shit. Not the other way around. You don't ask who I am, you let me know who you are. I don't ask. Asshole.

But as of today I have been getting these phone calls. I dunno who the hell it is from but the same number kept on calling. Its kinda freaky. Everytime I answers, the line would be incredibly blurry and I can barely makes out a word. It goes like this:

"Hi. Why are you awake?"

"Who's this?"

"Its Jason."

"I dunno any Jason."

"But I know you."

Then the fucker hangs up. He done this 3 fucking times. You would ask why I kept on answering. That's a fair question and this is your answer: because I am the dumbass that did not save that number in my phone therefore I do not recognize it until I answer it. Now I do. And I'm pissed. So in a total bitch move I'm giving you people the number:


Call him and tell him to fuck off and die. Call him and say that you wanna chop of his balls and feed it to the goats. Call him and say that the Constantly Dramatic One sends a message, she says "Tonight Jason, you will sleep with the fishes". Or maybe write it on the wall of a bus stop "For a good time, call this number." Whatever you want to do with it, do it. I'm fed-up with his stupid late nights calls.

As if I don't have other issue to deal with.

Now go forth and do my biddings.....Would be much better if you can chop off his balls and feed it to the goats. I would be eternally grateful.


faye said...

I used to have a stalker...for a year. So I totally feel your pain.

I think the chopping of balls idea, is perfect :)

Technodoll said...

He he! CD is a freak magnet, reeeeerrr! :-D

PS: Grissom is HOT, so there.

Quin Browne said...

let's say i called him overseas, and i won't.

but, if i did, i'd be really rude and shit.

Elisabeth said...

I'd call but it would cost me a fortune - I do hope many, many other people call it though!

Jack ass.

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


Wow. For a year? Wow. Im impressed.


Oh hey....I am a freak magnet.



Thank for that =D


No truer words have been spoken.

Tinesh said...

Rest assured, he wont be calling you after Im done with him. He will be sleeping with the fishes but I wont pass him that message. I bet he would be like HUH? WTF WASSAT?

evie said...

yeah, the typical idiot would call your mobile then ask "siapa ni?" or "mana ni?"

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


Coz he is a fucking dumbass.


I know!!! So. Fucking. Annoying.

Melissa said...

finally i'm back home for the weekends with internet connection and i can read ALL these!

hmm that number? maybe i should save it in my cellphone n call him up on days when i really wana vent out about my bad, bad days. padan muka. and yeah, i'll convey your message to him about having to share his bed with the fishes too. bodoh punya manusia.