Wednesday, February 25, 2009

My tangled web of lies

So uuuhh….I think I might have fucked up BIGtime this time around.


Before anything else I think y’all should know that I am majoring in Journalism. So that’s what I am studying over here. I wasn’t going to actually give out that piece of information on my blog but it is crucial to the story I am about to tell.


Now I bet you’re wondering why I am doing Journalism, no it is not because I want to be a journalist. I think journalism and print media is a dying art what’s with the coming of the internet. No one buys the paper anymore. No, I am merely using this as my stepping stone to become a screenwriter one day. I already have 2 scripts in the process. I have good ideas, it’s the character building that I am having issues with. However Journalism is fine by me. I know that whatever I ended up as in life, it would have something to do with writing. Other people go out clubbing for fun. I write. For fun.


So today was my compulsory Orientation for commencing Journalism students. It was sort of like a meet and greet with the members of the Journalism faculty. So I arrived late because I couldn’t find the room that it was held in. My campus is fucking huge; I need a map to get around. So when I stepped in, like 5 mins late there were already 30 something students in there. And I noted right at that moment, I was the only one who wasn’t Australian.




So I smiled at everyone and sat down, second row from front. Now see when you are the only one who isn’t Australian in the whole room, arrived 5 mins late and was wearing a bright red shirt with a huge ass Victoria’s Secret in diamante spelled across your…ahem, ample bosoms….you tend to attract attention. I’m just sayin. I noticed that a couple of lectures were already eyeing me. This does not bode well.


So we went through the program structure and then it came to the session where they randomly select students to say why they choose Journalism. So a couple of students were “Ooouuuu I wanna do journalism cause I wanna write scripts. Bla bla bla”, a bunch of surfer dudes who went “Yeah I want to take journalism cause I wanna write music reviews…yeah”, and then this bimbo who sat behind me said, out loud, to all the lectures that she wanna do Journalism cause she loves Sex and the City and she wanna be a columnist just like Carrie Bradshaw. Cause the fictional Carrie Bradshaw, is her idol.



Bish. Are you kidding me?



I don’t care if she is your idol. But the hell, you don’t say that in front of the whole faculty. The hell. And I thought the bimbos in Malaysia were bad. Then one of the lecturers looked at me. I knew what was coming.


“What about the young lady in the red Victoria’s Secret shirt?” She totally said that. “Whereabouts are you from?”


“I’m CD and I’m from Malaysia.”

“Oouuu that’s exciting. We rarely get international students in Journalism. Why don’t you come up here and tell us why you are doing Journalism.”


Please note that when all the other students were saying their bit, they were sitting down and not standing in front of the class. However, luckily unlike most people I know, I have no problems with public speaking. I actually kick ass at public speaking. So I went in front of the room, smiled and



“Well, once again, I’m CD and I’m from Malaysia.”



Now at this point I realise that I can say like so many others that the reason why I’m doing journalism is cause I wanna be a scriptwriter. But then that would be boring. They called me out in front of the class for a reason. They wanted a show. So I gave them a show.


“The reason why I want to be a journalist is because; personally I believe that journalists are the people who hold society together. They are the ones who bring the news to the people, the public and without them no one would know of world affairs. It’s more of a calling to me, then an actual career path. Especially from where I come from, there is no such thing as media democracy. It comes to the point that every media outlet are controlled by the government and every news and information are spinned the way they want it to be spinned. So when I become a journalist, I would make it my sole purpose to bring truth to the people and help end this subjugation by the government and hopefully make media democracy a reality in my country.”



Yeah. Top that Carrie-Bradshaw-wannabe-bimbo.



When I stopped talking, everyone looked impressed. And it occurred to me that bullshitting my way through in front of the whole faculty is a bad idea. But the hell, I’ve already said all that shit. Then one of the lectures went “Aren’t you afraid of being jailed?” The answer to that is of course I am. Whose not afraid of being jailed? But what I said was


“I’m not gonna say that it does not scare me. It does. However the way I look at it, change cannot come just like that. It has to be fought for. Sacrifices have to be made. And if that means being jailed then yes, I am willing to face that….if brings change that is for the better.”


That my friend, was bullshit at its very best.


Then one of the lecturer looked at me and she said “I like your passion. We rarely see that in young people anymore these days. And good for you for wanting to do that for your country.”


I am soooo fucked.



So now, they all know me as the passionate Malaysian girl and I don’t even want to be a journalist. This is soo bullshit. Why do I keep on doing shit like this to myself? Why? God, why? Why do I always get myself into these tangled web lies. Can't I just say the real reason. No I can't cause I just have to be dramatic. Just haaaave too. Goddamnit.


But on the plus side, the students that were in that class thinks I’m cool now. That's right. Me. Cool. I don't think there was ever a time that people associate me with "cool".....but they are now. Yeah...... I could live with that. 



Zikri said...

Woman you are awesome.
You haven't even become a journalist and you're already possibly infringing some journalistic ethics XD

JD Cole said...

u go gurl!!

honey, a lot of us are doing thing for the wrong reasons ;)

i wouldn't call it's call "being optimistic" ;P

Tine said...

Haha, girl, you'll be an AWESOME journalist ;)

rujing said...

ha, you crack me up. i'm going on my journalism orientation day tomorrow, am so copying your answers on cue cards.


RB said...

Bullshit is was makes the world go round! I pictured myself sitting in your class next to Ms. Sex In The City and saying "BOOM, Roasted!" after your speech haha.

Tinesh said...

fuck yea!!! lies, lies and more lies. IF i dont come to Aussie for the sole sake of hot chicks, I'll see you in hell k? :D

sticks :D

evie said...

Respect woman. You bullshit damn well! I must take lessons :p

farid said...

bullshit at its finest was when you told that girl in that club that you dig her dress and complimented her to no end, when in fact she was giving you the stink eye, you thought she was a skank and her top is fugly.

bullshit at its finest was when you stayed over at my place and fabricated an intricate lie with details that could convince even the parental units while i had to play the role of two girlfriends.

you my dear, as i've said it many times over, are a pathological liar. and that is why i love you.

if in the future i plan to rob the swiss bank, i'll be thinking of you.

Cheryl said...

Hahah there is nothing wrong with lying to get ahead.. or just to show up SATC-bimbos.

There used to be so many girls like that in my classes- the Carrie Bradshaw wannabees, and after University, they moved to New York.

Get real.

Prince Gomolvilas said...

Ha ha ha ha! Your speech was hilarious! It it better to look good than be truthful!!!!

Michelle said...

You are so fucking hilarious! I could never think up bullshit spontaneously. I am jealous of you!

Cam said...

You're good in public speaking! A bunch of lies wouldnt hurt that much if you'll be known as the cool malaysian girl!

jaak said...

managed perception ftw

winda said...

CD, you're just way to awesome for word!! :D

peachy said...

bahahahahaha <333333

Frank said...

I had to go through something like that. I had to get letters of recommendation from a bunch of my professors so I could apply to graduate school, but before they gave them to me, they all made me go through a song and dance about why I want to go to grad school.

Basically I said a bunch of stuff about wanting to further my education and go into publishing and contribute to the greater media society of Chicago. They were all impressed.

But the truth is that I'm afraid of the "real world" and I don't wanna move back in with my parents.

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


I know! The irony of it all. =D

JD Cole:

Yeah, lets call it that shall we? =p


But I don't want to be a journalist. But from the way of things...I could be a spin doctor......=p


Haha! Be my guess =D

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


I know! She is sooo annoying. Like the hell you go to uni for with that kind of mentality? Goddamn.


"fear.pain.hatred.power,"? New way of signing off? Oooouuu me likey. Also come to Aussie bitch. I miss my sunflowers.


No young pedawan, bullshit cannot be taught. It has to come from within....



Farid, I have NO IDEA what you are talking about. Seriously.


the Constantly Dramatic One said...


Holy crap! There a bunch of these people and not just one? Daaaamn...


"It is better to look good than to be truthful."

That would be my new motto in life. Haha =D


I was put on the spot. Sink or swim babes, sink or swim...


I was thinking the same exact thing....=D

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


Haven't seen you round these parts for a while now.


That's "Ossum" with a capital O. Thank you. =P


Wait till it's your turn.


But hey, you got in right?

Cecilia said...

It's obvious nobody's going take the bimbo seriously in your faculty now. It amazes me that people of their kind get this far along in life.

quin browne said...

i love when you make me laugh.

and, well, i'm proud of you, too... because, no matter you call it bullshitting, in the end, you are the type who would go to jail for her convictions.

and that deserves applause.

*clap. clap. clap*

ATL Princess said...

That is one very shiny, pretty lie you've got there! lol

Adrienne said...

LOL, i would have totally bullshit my way through too but i bet i wouldn't be able to do it as confidently as u did. ;p

Hows the land down under so far?

Technodoll said...

He he! I think you'll be the class leader in no time girl! Now start writing, LOL!

Fieran said...

Sometimes you end up saying things you *THINK* you don't even believe in - it comes straight from the heart. I don't think you lied there. I think you really do have that passion but just did not realise it :) Good luck CD, you're gonna be "ossum" :) *HUG*

Anonymous said...

Well done, the advantage you had is that you were prepared to say something, you will enjoy your opportunities to speak more openly.

When you have the political freedom that you have in Australia it is completly taken for granted.

You have a head start over your fellow students because you know you have something to fight for, life may have been a little too easy for Aussie students and you will soon find that out.

Aussies are often very keen to embrace an "outsider" and you have the chance to be championed as a free speech advocate.

welcome to the lucky country or the land of the long weekend.

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


They go futher still cause they'll be willing to sleep their way to the top.

If you get what I'm sayin...


Really? You think so? Jail is awfully scary....=S

ATL Princess:

I know! =D


Hhaha!! Bullshitting through life is the only way to go. Haha!! The Land Down Under is like an adventure for me now. Seriously. Something new everyday you know.

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


OMG!! I have too!! 2 thousand words essay everyweek for 12 weeks. Yikes!


Indeed...I am ossum =P


"Lucky country"...yeah I've learned of that term in class today. Finally found out what it means and why you call it that =)