Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Bring on the unknown, bitch.

Not including today, I have exactly 4 days left in Malaysia.


People ask me how am I feeling now? Nothing much really. Any anxiety, any excitement, any emotional bullshit that I should or should not be feeling at this point in time are all overshadowed by this room fuckery. Not to say that I do not have a room, I actually have like 5 now. Found them through real estates websites. I just do not want to send in money online and commit myself. I mean, everything sounds fantastic online, people are trying to sell you shit so everything is sugar-coated, and then when you arrive at this supposedly magnificent room….the ceiling’s leaking, the bus stop is too far away and you are living an hour away from college. Or maybe even worst, it’s just a scam to get your money. Renting out a room that don’t exists to international students. Shit like this happens.



So I will be staying in a hotel a couple of days when I get there while I meet up with realtors to see where is best. If you’re thinking “Hey CD, how come you’re not crashing at your friend’s place?” That’s a simple question, its cause I have no friends there. I purposely chose a university that I do not know anyone of. I always wonder why people go overseas and study at these places where they already know people there. What’s the point? What’s the point of going far away only to be with your own kind, to be with the same people, to always, perpetually stay in your comfort zone? None really. There’s no growth.

Same shit, different time zone.


The reason why I can’t ask people to find a room for me is cause I don’t have anyone I know there. Even if I do, I won’t ask for help. You can only go so far in life if you always depending on the sympathy of people. Here I am with family and friends. I live comfortably, I have a car, and I always have money. There I will not know anyone, I probably will not be able to live comfortably, I will definitely not have a car and without doubt I am going to be broke. Oh I haven’t mentioned this. My dad is cutting me off after the third month.



It’s his rule. He pays for the tuition bill and the rent, but he’s not gonna give any allowance after the third month. By the fourth month I’m there, I should be able to hold a job already or starve. It’s my Dad’s way of teaching his kids of the “real world”. My sister waited tables through Law School. Technically my dad paid for Law school and she only have to support herself but woman totally played the whole “Paying for law school through waitressing” thingy. My brother worked two jobs when he was in America. And now it’s my turn. My friends asked if there is a way of getting out of it, like if there’s a way I could have him still gives me money after the third month but to tell you the truth….I rather not.


First off, it’s unfair to my sis and bro. They both got cut off after the third month, why should I be any different? I mean my sister could work through Law school; my brother worked two jobs while studying for a double degree and still managed to graduated top of his class. I mean, fuck man. I’m not in Law school, I’m not doing double degree….if anything my circumstance is easier then them. Plus it’s an ego thing you know. I don’t want to be known as the weak one just cause I’m the youngest. Plus I don’t want to be 81 years old and have my parents tell my grandchildren on how Grandma CD was too useless to hold a job and begged Great Grandpa to give her money when she was in Australia.

Seriously bitches, till my dying days I will not hear the end of it.

My dad and his tough love methodology….But that’s the point of studying abroad. It’s like a rite’s of passage, the moment in life where you stepped out of your comfort zone and see what you made of. Here, I’m the pampered Drama Queen. There? Who knows? But that’s the thing about life. It’s all about freefalling into the unknown. And your dad cutting you off and you have to starve for days on end. And yeah…fun.


So how am I feeling now?


Contemplative. I’m contemplating life…..and where I stand in it.


ロザリザ said...

Good Luck TCD !!!

tunjuk lah kepada mereka di luar sana yang bahawa, anak melayu boleh!!

LWM said...

Same shit, different time zone.

Haha, that line made my day.

jaak said...

is prostitution legal in australia?

Stranger in Canada said...

I really enjoy this blog.
I will continue reading it.
Good luck in australia, and keep up the good work.

juraiza said...

yeap good luck in australia.

and I always feel numb a few days before I leave.

Earning your own money is a good experience. I too work throughout my college years.

But keep in touch with msians might miss a few things like stupid msian junk food that I can't believe I spend a whole lot when I don't even buy it here in msia.oh well.

JD Cole said...

"...What’s the point? What’s the point of going far away only to be with your own kind, to be with the same people, to always, perpetually stay in your comfort zone? None really. There’s no growth."

that's a really good remark CD...i'm touch because i hv the same opinion too.

all the best of luck darl~

dun worry too much, i hv a feeling that u'll fit in just perfect :)

evie said...

I was just about to say you're freefalling and then you took the word right out of my mouth! Kinda surreal, cos I was supposed to have my freefalling moment this year but that's been put on hold for a bit. Glad to see someone else do it and good luck. I know you'll do well :)

winda said...

god, cd, even in your seriously contemplative mood, you manage to be inventive with that 'same shit, different time zone' thing :)

i agree with your reasoning, but me, being spoiled and all, a company is more preferable :P

btw, cd, i heard from the students who's there already that trying to find side job in oz for int'l students is pretty hard. Unlike in america where everyone can wait table. But, that's just them and it was some time ago. You may find different outcome now :)

and, your dad is super cool to have that kind of principle. Teach the kid that he didnt grow money-tree.

and gee.. why do i always give long comment?

Anonymous said...

good luck in Australia tcdo! u'll do great. =)

senorita.. said...

so true. that's y i try not to mix with ppl from Malaysia too much.

best of luck, u're a tough girl.. u WILL make it.

Charlotte said...

Good luck in Australia! You will be fine, going abroad is always a good experience. Sooner or later you will find the point, you'll see.

sab said...

wow! i actually like your Dad's rule! :) i wish my dad would let me go. haha!

i'm very excited for you, i hope everything goes well. :)

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


Huyooo....dashyat lah kak...=p


Glad to know that and thank you for reading my blog =)


No, it is not. And oh, hows the view of the ocean from your workplace today?

Stranger in Canada:

My mama always says never speak to a stranger...but for you I make an exception. =)

Thank you for reading my blog. Appreciate it.

kimber p said...

I seriously love reading your posts, I have no doubt in my mind you're going to be a success at anything you attempt....because growth is exactly what we're here to accomplish.

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


Haha! Yeah, I know it's not usual to work through college but question is...did you get cut off too? Cause I won't be getting any side money from my Dad. It's the salary or nothing at all.

Le sigh.

JD Cole:

I'm glad that someone else shares the same opinion.


Really?! You had that thought too?....I'm telling you dude, we're related =P


Oh huney, go on ahead. You can even write you own blog in my comment box. I don't mind =)

Anyways, I work on-campus lah. Get a job as soon as I could. Good principle....but an annoying one. Wanna send me some money? =P

the Constantly Dramatic One said...


Thank you for the vote of confidence! =D


I'm not tough lah....I damn manja. I just don't show it. Meh.


I know that already...but its fantastic to hear someone else says it too =)


Well ask him then! Then ask him to send money that's supposed to be for you to me.


Kidding! =P

kimber p:

Thank you. I do strive to be entertaining =) And also thank you for the vote of confidence as well. I appreciate it.

Fieran said...

Hey CD :) Good luck. You can work 20 hours a week I think, with an Australian student visa. It's not easy to get a job - BUT, it is possible. They have these job agencies where you can work as a waitress at events and earn good money. Good luck!!! You'll do great!


Technodoll said...

Tee hee. She's sitting, not standing... or she's levitating, rather.

Maybe you feel like your feet are floating off the ground, too... so! close!!

Do take a minute to go listen to the Christian Bale video on the Diaries... it's 2 minutes that will make you smile!

taxy said...

Hey, have a great time down under! I just know you're gonna enjoy it.

Michelle said...

Wow, I'm so excited for you! I'm sure you'll be fine and have a great time! Good luck!

liyana r said...

Aww youre funneh. Anyway which part ru going to? If its near the East, who knows i might show up there for diving or whatever. Hehh. Anyway, have fun girly, Australian beach boys have the best abs.

juraiza said...

Yeah I too get cut off from my dad. but once in a year when I'm in a total pinch especially when I'm saving money to buy flight tickets back to Malaysia appeals to my dad's conscience.So I always get a hundred or two to cover me for that particular time.

It's fair considering I'm paying 1200 for that ticket.

Anyway, my sisters sometimes too secretly send me money as well. Because yeah I'm the youngest and they feel sorry for me having a rough time.kiki again appeal to their humanity.

Anonymous said...

Your dad is right. 3 years ago I had to work to support myself through college as my family could only afford to pay for my tuition fees and flight (and some cash as a start la kan) So I had to find a job (nasib baik they pay good money here) and I am more thankful than ever now cause now I know how hard it is to earn your own money. You'll definately come out stronger in the end.

joshua said...

*hugs* dearie... YOU WILL SURVIVE AND COME OUT A STRONGER WOMAN! with all the more fabulousity flowing!

Yunus Izam said...

What’s the point? What’s the point of going far away only to be with your own kind, to be with the same people, to always, perpetually stay in your comfort zone? None really. There’s no growth.

Agree 100%. Stay away from other Malaysians if you can. Who cares if they label you as 'sombong'.

Like I said, its not only about the education. You can get education here, but going overseas is to experience foreign life, and make friends with people from all over the world.

All the best to you.

Anne said...

and i just booked my tix to kl next week :( oh well.. no jodoh to meet up just yet. you have fun there and please keep safe! i cant wait to go to oz too, just hoping that damn load clears. fingers crossed!

Frank said...

Enjoy Australia...if I were there I would hire you as my personal bacon chef...but I'd only be able to pay you in Oreos and pennies.

Peter Varvel said...

Good for you, TCDO!
In about three months when you're starving your ass off, you're going to be one fierce and fabulous bag lady, LOL.
Just kidding - I know you will survive. I can't wait to read about your new adventures!

quin browne said...

i love your dad's way of doing this... my way was to give the offer of either university or work...but, once you were out of high school, you couldn't have a free ride. if you lived at home and worked, you paid rent.


they all went to university.