Thursday, December 04, 2008

Of things that are pissing me off during the finals: Part 3

Listen you worthless piece of shit, I do not know which country you are from but I’m from Malaysia. And in this country, most of us drive like fiends from Hell. So riddle me this asswipe, why the hell are you driving like a pussy when you’re in the fast lane? Seriously.


I understand that there is a speed limit. Yes I know, 110km/j on the fucking highway. But here’s the deal, everyone who drives on the fastlane, none of us abide by that. None of us. Personally the slowest I ever been- when the fucking road is relatively empty- is 160km/j. So again, why in the fucking blue hell is your slow ass on the fastlane? My car is red in colour bitch. When my Dad bought it for me, it says there “Extreme red”. Don’t tell me your eyes can’t see my “extreme red” car from miles away going 180? Can’t you move your ass fast enough for me to get through? If you really feel like you need to drive like a fucking pussy, then please direct your slow ass to the slow lane. Not the fast lane.



I have an exam to get too. Now the fact that my paper starts at 4pm and I left my house at 3.30pm when I live about 40km away from college is a non-issue. What is an issue here is that your drive like a pussy. People have places to get too, things to meet, people to do…or did I get that wrong…but the fact that mattered is, your pussy driving is in the way. If you can’t locate the fucking acceleration pedal in your motherfucking car why in the fucking blue hell are you on the fast lane?



Now, see I don’t like tailgating people. I heard in the radio they say that that shit is actually road bullying. And bullying is not cool under any circumstance. But when you are going what, 90km/j on the motherfucking fast lane and not moving your ass fast enough for me get through, it pisses me off. And on the road, I get piss off really fast. I’m sorry if I scared you when I tailgated your ass for maybe 12kms even when you’ve already switched lane. You fucking deserve it. If your ass have no bizniz on the fastlane, then don’t get on it on the first place.



Thanks to your pussy driving, I was 5 mins late for my paper. If I ever see you on the road again- I will end you bitch.


***

Whenever a guy hits on me, I make sure that I am always pleasant and never rude. I understand that it takes a lot of guts for a guy to come up and talk to a chick. Especially ones that have a default-bitch-face like mine. I can never go up to a guy and ask him out because I do not have the balls for it. Literally and figuratively speaking. So when a guy hits on me, I try to make it pleasant for the both of us but will still definitely drive the point home that: “Yes, I am single” but “No, I am not available.”

It gets to me when these dudes just do not fucking get it. Hey asshole, just because I was pleasant to you doesn’t mean I want to suck your dick tonight mmmkay? It just means that I am considerate. Just because I do not tell you to fuck off and die doesn’t mean you should pressure me for my fucking phone number. I do not want to give it to you. You are an asshole. Harassing me will not make me fall madly and deeply in love with you.




Thank you so much for the douchebaggery you inflicted on me. I now have lost all faith in men and will now join the Carpet Munchers team.

***

I have disabled my “Add as Friend” button on Facebook. I cannot fucking take it anymore. I cannot take it when college freshmen and juniors hit me up over FB just randomly wants to add me as friend. Listen, some people who live in the virtual world, yeah those people who wants “popularity”, yeah those bitches are the ones with 100, 000++ friends. I am not those people. I only add people whom I know and like. The people I add are actually, shockingly, my friends. People I actually have some contact with, have a decent conversation with.


Me telling you to shut the fuck up in class because I was trying to sleep does not make a proper conversation. Me telling you to get out of my way, do not make us friends. We sharing one class, when I don’t even notice that we were in fact- sharing a class - does not make us friends. Stop trying to add me. I will not be part of your quest to achieve online immortality.



I now have disabled my “Add as Friend” button. I also deleted 77 people off my FB, ones that I have been arsed into adding. If you’re not my friend, or frenemy, I have no interest whatsoever in getting up to date with your life.

Now, step away from the computer and go live your life in the real world.

***

Also, can someone explains what fuckkery is this?




It keeps on popping out now and then. Pissing me off. Why is it doing that though?




Bold
Footnotes:

For part 1 of things that are pissing me off during the finals: click
this.

For part 2: click this.

17 comments:

sab said...

i have a default-bitch-face too. :)

i've learned my lesson. trying to be nice is actually saying yes to a guy. so, yeah, better be mean rather have someone stalking you. :)

gypsy-on-the-move said...

Erm...that thing, the kapersky anti-virus thing...it is to protect your PC from harmful page...now, i know you're gonna say Google isn't harmful, but I think something is wrong with Google this afternoon, hence, the page is blocked. But it is okay now, isn't it?

Tinta Sisyphus said...

hey i like the colour of your browser.

Frank said...

I just make it easier for both me AND the girls by never hitting on anyone. I'm a wuss like that, but a gentlemanly wuss!

Prince Gomolvilas said...

"Hey asshole, just because I was pleasant to you doesn’t mean I want to suck your dick tonight mmmkay?"

...Now see, it works exactly like this in MY world.

winda said...

oohh... and here i was trying to locate you on facebook :)

AH! me have default-bitch face too!!!

now lets see who else got beside sab and i :D

Anonymous said...

Dear TCDO...

It's insane to drive at that speed...yeah we know, it's impossible for you to die in a car crash coz your fat can cushion you...but pls be a lil considerate about other normal sized Malaysians...You are incrediby silly to drive at that speed...we dunno where you fat people are rushing off to...the nearest deli? ...slow down...let your body burn up some calories while you wait for your next meal...

p/s: i bet the person you crash into would be squashed not coz of the impact of the car...but because of you.


Drive safely =)

senorita.. said...

sigh... why do people go round asking for friend requests? why?!?

AV said...

Dear Anon. She said she's going to her exam didn't she? Why you so stoooopid? Go read it back properly.

And hey CD *waves* Long time reader here but first timer commentor. :)

jaak said...

indomie, seleraku

peachy said...

Hey CD, you have a hater!
Congratulations. And THANK YOU. For updating :D Soooo funny! You always make me laugh =]

I've never forgotten the midnight McD's drive-thru incident. And never will hehe.

the Constantly Dramatic One said...

Sab:

Yeah! Bitch face! *high fives*

Gypsy:

Oh...it all makes sense now....

Tinta:

That's my fav colour. Purple =)

Frank:

Haha! You're so cute =)

the Constantly Dramatic One said...

Prince:

Oh hahaha!!! OMG Prince, thats soooo funny!! =D

Winda:

Apparently...it's just us Winda *_*

Anon:

Ooohhh silly goosey Anon. Now how am I gonna squashed someone with my body? You're implying that my body can be thrown out of the car, through the windshield and then lands on the other driver right?

But the thing is, that's not gonna happen cause I'm too fat and too heavy to be flying out of cars and squashing people.

Be realistic next time ya? You silly goosey you.

Senorita:

Fucking irritating kan?

the Constantly Dramatic One said...

AV:

Oh hey AV. Awwww you're so sweet but no need to be angry with Anons next time ya? They keep me entertained. I am grateful.

Thanks for reading! =)

Jaak:

Oh kaaaayyy....weirdass message buuuttt THANKS for the update on that crazy pimp/full of shit guy.

I need to translate it through BabelFish though. But thanks for the tip! =)

Peachy:

Awww Peachy, thanks but I'm sorry cause I gotta call for a hiatus for a while. Kinda emo right now.

It's not fun blogging bout being emo. It's only fun when I'm being a bitch. But don't worry, I will be back and thank you for reading my blog.

I appreciate it =)

erm said...

hahahahaha

would love to see "extreme red" in hiway....because when you see my car with the scoop....it says in the bonnet..."move away!"

overall nice blog post

keep writing

Sayang said...

Dearest Sayang,

It's been great fun advising you on healthy food choices, fahion and proper womanly ettiquetes...but today, I humbly bow out from your blog...You are a wonderful entertainer although you are fat...I laugh my guts out when I read some of your posts. Truly your wittiness and creativity are vast as your ever expanding waistline. However, your bitchy rantings vexes the soul...you kiss your mama with that potty mouth?Not good.

I humbly bow out to now advise another person on healthy food choices, fahion and proper womanly ettiquetes...most of all on healthy food choices and plastic surgery...

And that person is your friend, Trix i think? The fat one in the circle of your friends besides you...can you do your sayang one last favour and direct me to her blog...

All the best in life. Here's to a healthier, more proper, less vulgar..you! xoxo

the Constantly Dramatic One said...

Erm:

Thank you erm, and thank you for stopping by my blog.

Sayang:


To my Sayang with all my love,

Thank you for all the backhanded compliments. Because I like the...how did you put it that time...right the "ATTENTION", I'll take whatever I can get.

I want you to know that your visits here have been infinitely entertaining to me. I look forward to the supposedly hate comments you left me, it makes for a good laugh everytime I read them. You Sayang, my love, is just as a wonderful entertainer as I am if not a little bit dry. And vile.

I'm fat but funny, you hate me but aspires to be me. We all have our vices eh?

In any event please know that you are always welcomed here on Dramatic Musings. Amusing creatures such as yourself are always welcomed. I’ll miss you and look forward to the moment when you give in to your obsession on everything concerning me and come back to be all amusing again in my comment box.

Goodbye Sayang, my love, may you die being trampled by a herd of elephants.

hugs, kisses and all that jazz,
the Constantly Dramatic One

P/S: Trix doesn’t blog. I’m sorry. But I’m always here for you to read about on what a fabulous life I lead and then feel worthless to when you compared your existance to mine.