Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Boobies. I has them.

The other day as the Constantly Dramatic One was sitting with friends on Level 4, talking shit, cursing the slow internet connection and stared in wonder at the laptop's screen after finding out that the damn college administration had banned Facebook from being accessed when something fascinating happened. A chick walked past. Now there's nothing that amazing about her. She just another random chick that happened to walk by. But the thing about this particular chick is that perhaps she is having some kind of problem in the undergarment department. I'm thinking she have not got the right bra for her.

Her breast wasn’t that big and she wasn't walking to attract attention but she was nonetheless walking. And with every step her breasts bounced. And with every bounce almost all the male eyes in the room was on her. On her breasts. It was like some kind of a ping pong game and they were just fascinated by her breasts. And I was fascinated by them. Here was this chick, minding her own business, wearing a polo top and jeans and she hold all the male attention in the room. Just coz her breasts bounced.

So I look down to my breast and I was like "Hello lumps of fat on my chest, what is this power that you have that have got the men all so fascinated?" Of course my breasts couldn't reply so I sat there for about a minute or so just staring at my own breasts trying to figure it out. I bet it was fucking weird if anyone saw me do that. And then out of sheer curiosity I turned to my guy friend Ali who was sitting next to me and asked him point blank "Hey, how come men are so fascinated by breasts?"


"How come men are so fascinated by breasts?"

He blinked. I stared. He mumbled something I couldn't comprehend.

" come?"

"I dunno, maybe because we don't have them?"

"I don't have a penis, I don't stare at some random guy's penis all the time."

"Uhhhh.....well I dunno!"

"Okay.............. why?"

"Uhhhhh....fuck. How do I explain this to you? Uhhhhh....hhhmmm....uhhh...."

"So you dunno why you do it?"

"I know. I just need to tone it down for you."

Tone it down for me? Tone it down for me? Holy crap. I bet it's vulgar.

Fortunately for him we were interrupted by a bunch of our friends joining us. This matter wasn't finished though. Today we were having a cafe to help raise money for the victims of snowstorm in China when the matter came up again. And now it wasn't like one on one. A bunch of us were sitting together when Ali said "Hey, CD why don't you ask the guys what you asked me the other day?!" Like in front of the whole fucking group. There was like six guys and they wanna know what is it that I wanted to know coz Ali was being a bitch and making it sound so lewd and they were all staring at me.......... so I asked.

The reaction was hillariously funny. Ali started grinning like a fucking idiot, Jatin got all shy, Sathya had a deer in a headlights kinda look on his face, 3kc started giggling, Cheesecakeerian was observing like a detached scientist and Tinesh on my right exclaimed "Oh crap." loudly. And then Tinesh came up with "Because they are covered up all the time!" to which Cheesecakeerian replied "But some girls just walk around without covering them!" Then Jatin open his mouth, trying to explain, but no words came out. He just kept on opening his mouth and closing them, unintentionally doing a brilliant impression of a dying goldfish.

And then Ali the He-Bitch was like "We dunno!! How come you like ass so much?!" Fucking loud okay. Fucking loud. There were people walking by, the he-Bitch.

"I dunno!"

"Well we dunno why we like breasts either!"

"Hey I asked first!"

"Doesn't matter who asked first! It's the same answer.We dunno, and you don't either."

So now, this whole question has become like that stupid Chicken and Egg question. Which came first? The chicken or the egg? No one can really answer it. But damn, I am curious okay. What is the deal with breasts? What?! So dear Drama Lovers, maybe you can come up with your two cent. For pure scientific purposes of course. Satisfy my curiosity. Breasts are just lumps of fat on a woman's chest. They can produce milk given the circumstance but other than that, they are just lumps of fat. What is the big deal? Seriously.

And oh my ass fascination? Yeah, I totally have an explanation for that but I won't. Because even after toning it down, it ain't that kind of blog.....


Maverick SM said...

It may be true that many men love to watch the boobs bounch, but there's hardly any reason to watch; it's kinda sexy.

But if a woman wears a low cut and exposes part of her breast, then it's sexual desire; the instinct of a man which will direct their brain to lust.

And if she exposes half her breast and wears, let say, Miniskirt which will expose her thigh, then it's voluptuousness.

And if she exposes all, and has an excellent body, then men will go mad and insane until they purge those sperms.

In truth, breast alone, even bouncing breast don't really tempt men; but sexy girl, sexily dressed will; because he's man, and that's biological in nature.

If any man doesn't, then watch out; he's not a man.

a a l i y a h said...

i read somewhere that it's because they look like bums :P only cuter and squishy-er.

got it from here:

Technodoll said...

It's the Oedipus thing, hun. Breasts = milk = nourishment, comfort and love = MOTHER.

Breasts are sexy cuz they are cushy, biteable, suckable and fun to fondle. They are hence toys, and all boys like to play with toys... specially toys that are "dirty" and "forbidden" that also remind them of "mother".

There you go :-)

Jen (MahaloFashion) said...

college banned facebook? that's just strange. wasn't facebook made for college students anyway?

Sincerely, King Bitch said...

"I don't have a penis, I don't stare at some random guy's penis all the time."

I love that line.

I wish I could tell you why men like breasts, but I can't think of anything! :/

You do have to write one day what's the story behind your ass fetish. :p

evie said...

i cannot understand it either, this fascination i mean. ass fascination i can understand cos i have it too, but yeah... it's not that kind of blog so i'm not gonna say it :p

3kC said...



keeps your hands off my bloobies...

ohhh..dear...the rooster came! guy bimbo..HIMBO..yay!

constant drama said...


Before anything else, lemme just find out that it is incredibly juvenile of me to find out that this line "until they purge those sperms." is funny as hell.

Ok, so its biological. It is what is, is that what you're saying right? Damn. I am hoping for a more structured answer but some things in life is just not explainable.

And if any man do not check out boobs that means his gay. Doesn't mean he is not a man. Still a man, but with better style and make a better shopping companion. True story.

constant drama said...


Ouuu thanks for the link. That was a good read!


I have to say your answer is the best. I mean it makes sense you know that they wanna play with breasts. I wanna play with them too! Oedipus complex is so fucked up but it does explain a whole lot of stuff.


Its not strange when your college is run by a bunch of stupid fucks. That's why. Seriously.

Thanks for dropping by!

constant drama said...

King Bitch:

Maybe I will, when I'm feeling particularly horny. =p




Ali is a himbo now? AHAHAHAHAHHA!! LMAO!

Tinesh said...

Bugger I havent gotten any response..Either nobody's visiting my blog, or they are and they dont wana comment..Haiz..

Tinesh said...

Owh owh I liked Jatin's impression of a dying goldfish lmao!

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

actually tinesh was spot-on. People are bunch of curious lot. the more that certain part is covered, the more curious our mind gets. you may ask why we still stare when boobs are partly covered. simple. They're yet fully exposed!

cheesecakeerian said...

I still think it's cos it's bouncy.

constant drama said...


You readers are lazy buggers =p .


You still stare when they're exposed. Even more so. So what have we achieved her brother Kerp? Hhhhmmm?


The bounce is hypnotizing you know. Seriously.

Quin Browne said...

according to my oddship, it's the mother/whore thing.

i calls them breasticles, btw.

jus' saying'

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

i think boobs are like football. we like to play the game and better still if we could score.

ever wondered why gay guys prefers fashion designing than the beautiful game itself?

constant drama said...


Mother/whore thing? Do I really wanna know?


Oh god Kerp, dont go starting a new thread of questions now. Urrrghh.

Nerd-tastic said...

I can just picture the gang in that situation hahahaha :D
Fuckin hilarious!
PERSONALLY I think . . . . .that . . . . .well even I find them hypnotizing from time to time. They're jsut very aesthetically pleasing???
I dunno haha
Maybe how much fun they'd be to play with??? That is if you want to get all graphic with it. . . .

As for your ass fetish, haha I think we've discussed this before. On that note. . . .Mr. Buns from our old english class still going to Help? ;P

constant drama said...


Jooooo!!! I misss joooo!!!!!!!! Ahahahahah, yes we have discussed the ass fetish. Not only am I fascinated with my own ass but I am fascinated with his ass.

I already have like 4 classes with him. If anything Mr.Tight Buns ass have gotten even tighter. Waaaaaaaaay tighter. Its damn distracting when he walks into the class okay. Just wanna grab it!


Nerd-tastic said...

If only he knew the hypnotizing and all wielding power his buns have over you hahahahaha a whole new world would open up to him. If he wanted anything all he'd have to do is FLEX his cheeks (you know which ones Im talking about) and you'd be all over it hahaha :D