Thursday, March 13, 2008

Stalking pays

Remember my ULTIMATE FRENEMY from highschool? Yeah, that bitch. She's back from Europe to visit her family and she gave me a call asking if I wanna meet up this Friday.

See, normally I would have told her no on accounts that I hate her and that if she were caught in a burning building, instead of calling the fire brigade I will pull up a chair, and have popcorn as I watch the building burn down and cackles everytime I hear her screams from within. My hate have no boundaries. For the record, the Constantly Dramatic One is not nice. Just so you know.

But the thing is.........I have been
stalking her blog now for awhile. And I know for a fact that she is having a shitty time in Europe. She only have one friend. She's bored there. She always blog about how lonely she is. And that she thinks her life is going nowhere. All these dreadful entries..... This is for all those years you fuck around with people lives back in highschool woman. Karma is indeed a bitch ain't it?

So I'm eager to see if she was just as pretentious and desperate for attention as she was back in the day. I wanna meet her so that she could lie to me about how great her life is when for a fact I know she doesn't have one. I want her to speak with a European accent when I know she blogs about how European people cannot understand her when she speaks. I wanna hear about all the places she visited in Europe, when she blogs about how she is always stuck in the house. I wanna hear all that. I won't call out on her lies. I will be sarcastic.

Then I will meet up with my friends from highschool who hate her equally and have new stuff to bitch about.Because that's how we roll.

I do know however that she went to Kanye West's concert. She had like 3 massive entries about that. Bet bitch gonna talk about that. No matter, I can just say that I think Kanye is an asshole and that people who listens to hiphop are very sad. It's sad because there is no depth in those music and its utterly shameful that women are into it as well. All these songs ever do is objectifiying women. Strip them out of their rights as human beings and
label women as mere sex objects. And then I will look condescendingly at her while I sip my cafe' latte. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!

She of course doesn't need to know how I sing and dance to
Flo Rida's Low and how my friends and I sing This Is Why I'm Hot everytime we karaoke. She also doesn't need to know that I still sleep with stuff toys. I'm supposed to be more matured and worldly then her people. Work with me.

Also need to look super cute this Friday.
It's imperative that I look cuter than her.

Must. Look. Super. Cute.

Shit, I cannot buy any new outfits. It had been 2 months and 9 days now since I last shopped. Promised the Parental Units not to shop till June. Fuck. This is bad. I have to wear the clothes I already have, accessorize to glam it up. What to wear? What to wear? A LBD is pushing it. We're meeting for coffee people. Damn, what to wear? What to wear? This is crucial. I will put on some outfits, take pictures and let my Style Counsellors decide. And when I say Style Counsellors I mean 3kc and Cheesecakeerian. And maybe Tinesh coz he's a girl too.

And maybe I should stop at Benefit's counter for a makeover....Meet up with her with 3 inch of makeup on my face. AHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAH! Okay, that's truly pushing it. But whatever it is: MUST. LOOK. CUTE.

Cuter than that bitch anyways...


Ultimate Frenemy texted me saying she might not be able to make it. What the fuck??????????????? This is bullshit.


Zikri said...

This is when having a penis is better

Technodoll said...

Girl, you are bad! BAD!

But... i just love it :-)

gypsy-on-the-move said...

you will be cuter than her...hehe! and oh yeah...i love your eyes with eyeliner on it. and a little smokey hint.
oh, and i wanna hear all about it after friday. damn it! will be away for camping on saturday and sunday. but have to tell me all about it.
and last but not least, i miss you babe.

Michelle said...

I'm with you girl. I do the 40 year old version of the same kind of thing, only it's just to get information out of moms that I don't know well about kids that I can't stand and the other moms I can't stand.

3kC said...

welcome back 'home' hahaha

yay! ayam a style councellor..bring on the photos! lol!!!

Kuan said...

you dont have to look THAT cute, you just have to look confident and intimidating, i think you would prefer the latter approach

i can really understand how would you want to tackle this crumbling cookie, you're so going to crush her!

ooo this is exciting!

she indeed sounded extremely sad and lifeless and just so deserve it - even if i dont know how bitchy she was, but then again, you got good judgement of people, i suppose you wont go around calling everyone bitches =)

constant drama said...


Well, like you men dont compete too.


I know!!!


You're going camping? Dammit!! I always wanna go camping. And I miss you too.

And dont worry. I WILL UPDATE YOU. I will have a camcorder and record the whole thing. And I will look super cute.


Valerie said...

I know you're gonna look cuter than that hoochie.

constant drama said...


I know right. Its like we need to know. We hate you but we NEED to know.


Yes, my style counsellor is here. I need your wisdom.


Hey you're right. Confident and intimidating. I can pull that off much better than cute. I'm not really the cute type but she is. Wanna beat her at her own game. That's all. I'm damn kiasu.

Oh btw, you can ask Lalat bout this bitch. She knows my ULTIMATE FRENEMY. She hates her too.

arathi said...

You know the point when life gets better? This is the moment. When a frenemy does NOT know thats she's going in for deep shit.Get your guns loaded...i mean cannons...BRING THAT THING DOWN! Why the hell would she want to meet you? Its suicidal babe.

Anonymous said...

Melissa Theuriau is a great newsreader.

constant drama said...


To be fair, she wasnt a hoochie. Just a manipulative bitch. Loathing, I feel loathing.

And yes. Must look cuter.


Coz she's lonely lah. Got no one else. Deperate times call for desperates measure, including calling your frenemy.


I know that's you Pogo!! LOL!

Elisabeth said...

You don't need to try to look cuter than her; she's ugly (at least on the inside, anyway)!

Haha: good old Karma sorting her out in Europe!

Quin Browne said...

easy to look better, i mean, please.

oh, and, link? not that i stalk.

Tinesh said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
constant drama said...


That bitch cancel on me. Bet she got cold feet or something. We're meeting as a group and she said the rest of them can't make it. I dont think I can stomach her on my own so yeah.....


But then....she might find me. Oh mail you, sure.


WTH you wrote my FULL NAME FOR???! I deleted your comment. Crazy ass. And you're a girl. Deal with it.

Tinesh said...


happy? hehe

elfiejane said...

first she says she wants to meet u, then she cancels! shes fucking with u, woman.

now when are u gonna jumpa me?!

constant drama said...




Fucking bitch. Fucking bitch. I send her anthrax in the mail. We must meet so I can give you the lowdown. Oh wanna go for that Reptile Showcase they have in One Utama now?

evie said...

what? how dare she cancel after all that obsessing about what to wear and being cute!!!

and i like kanye! although, i didn't realise you karaoke-d. hehe

constant drama said...

Ooohh yeah, I karaoke. Cant sing for shit but that dont stop me. No sireee =p