Saturday, January 26, 2008

Oh dear Lord! My EYES!!!!

The Constantly Dramatic One have to take Islamic Studies this sem.

There are two extra subjects that Malaysian students need to do if we wish to graduate or transfer to overseas. The two subjects are Malaysian Studies and Islamic Studies if you're Muslim; OR Moral Studies if you're a non-Muslim. Its a stupid rule that are enforced on all students in this country. I really don't agree with it but who am I to say anything? Its my birthright as a Malaysian to be oppressed by dumb ass rule made by the government.

I don't mind really. I resent the fact that the Islamic Studies class in on Saturdays from 9am to 12pm. I mean people, seriously. Saturday is the day that I get to sleep in until 1 in the afternoon when for the rest of the weekdays I have to wake up at 7.30am for class. Tell me you wont get irritated too? But also I kinda glad to be in this class, to be enlightened again because of late I have been doing things that are securing me my one way ticket to uuuuhhhh Googling up uuuhhhh nude pics of Charlie Cox and turns out the bastard doesn't even have any so you see people? You seeeee? The Constantly Dramatic One is off the Islamic path and on that fast train to hell.

Situation must be remedied.

I went to my first Islamic Studies in total poser mode. I was garbed in
Baju Kurung - because in Islam we believe the female form must be covered, I had my hair tied back - as to not evoke lust in men (hah!) and no makeup or any other kind of self adornment because I am a good Muslim woman. I am innocent, pure and untouched. You of course know that this is bullshit, the Islamic Studies lecturer, the Ustaz - doesn't. See the beauty of it?

Class went on unhitched, I even got to answer some questions (after school Islamic tuition classes pays!!) and he seems satisfied, I was satisfied. Turns out I'm a good little poser. Then at the end of the class he announced that he have put up an extra credit assignment on his website and if anyone interested can go and check it out. I decided I want to do this extra credit assignment because you see people, Islamic Studies is the ONE subject I cannot afford to fail. Its not fine but it will still be acceptable if I fail Biology or Maths or whatever other subject. My parents will be pissed off of course, they will shout and scream and do all kinds of ungodly stuff, but I'll live. Now if I were to fail Islamic Studies, and seeing that the Constantly Dramatic One comes from a traditional Islamic family...the most valid theory is that my family WILL disown me. This is just a theory of course, but a theory I rather not test to be proven.

So here I am on a Saturday night, so damn hip that I contemplated to do my I.S extra credit assignment. Other people are out living it up and I'm home accessing the I.S website for the assignment questions because I'm super hip like that. Super. So I was scrolling down the website searching for the questions and my eyes landed on a picture of this gorgeous dude.
"Hello hello, what's this?"

Wow, cute guy. What he's doing here on this site. Scroll down...hhmmm, resume? Education? Years teaching? Wait a minute...
OHMYGAWD!!!!!! Its the Ustaz's biodata!! Its my Ustaz biodata!! Ohmygawd he's photogenic!!!!!! Ohmygawd I just checked out my Ustaz!!!!! OHMYGAWD OHMYGAWD OHMYGAWD!!!!! EWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!! WTF?!!!!!!!!!

Shit, I feel dirty. I cant believe this. I'm so disgusted with myself? Why the fuck is he so photogenic? Eh shit, I feel so dirty and disgusting now I have to shower coz eeeeeewwwww, can't fucking believe I just totally checked out my Ustaz. Who also happens to be married and have two children, according to his biodata. I'm disgusting disgusting disgusting. I wanna poke my eyes out. I wanna get a bucket full of lava and pour it into my eyes. Ewww disgusting.

Sick man. Sick.

Damn, I'm going to hell for this.


Zikri said...

thank God i finished my islamic studies part of lan in my first semester.

so you checked out your ustaz.. up to being the 2nd wife so his wife can get a golden umbrella in the afterlife for permitting him to get another wife? :P

Michelle said...

You are not sick, you are human. A young, healthy, female at that. Is appreciating the opposite sex that bad? LOL

Maverick SM said...

What's the thing that you saw? Would you share the link with me so that i too can learn something???

elfiejane said...



you thought your ustaz was hot!!

i am SO not gonna make you forget this!!

constant_drama said...


Eh, whatever lah with the "Golden Umbrella". Not gona happen, the man is photogenic in photos, NOT real life.

Disimpang malaikat 44 beb, jangan dibuat-buat.


Not when he's your MARRIED Islamic Studies lecturer. Then its a whole new ballgame. Yucks!


It was the photo of my Islamic Studies ustaz, that I found to be hot - in a moment of insanity- which resulted in me wanting to blind myself by stabbing my eyeballs out with forks.Or candle sticks.

Whichever that is within reach.


Eh. Crap.

You. Bitch.

gypsy-on-the-move said...

i bet he must be REAL cute that you're checking him out. =P